Unicode-8 on!

(If you can see what Im typing later on, rememebr to change your page encoding to Unicode-8)

Its like 12+ am now, but I just cant get to sleep thinking about life and everything related. In another 52 days will be the Chinese O level exam, whether i can do well or even pass is another issue. And after that for one month of June it will be practical time for my D&T project. Then for the lsat 4 months running from July to October will be a tiem of heavy revision and practice with neverending tests and mock exams. Also in this period is the preliminary examinations which determines if I am going to be a slob for the early part of 2006 or back to school with a new environment for a totally fresh start once again.

And lets just say I make it, i wil be 18, after two years (hopefully) when I leave, the country will call on me and I will lose anther 2 and a half years of my life, after which I will be around 23. Carry on? I Cant stop here as I will have no future to speak of, the only way is up, lets give it another 3 years or so, 27.

Only then will I go out and experience the world. 27. 10 years down the road, if everything goes smoothly according to plan. I have yet to do a scrap of work, fresh out of schooling and surely much wiser than I am now. What will the future hold? I dont know, who in the world does for sure?

Someone sent me this song, If im not wrong I think it is Kim Tian, (Thnxx) It's chinese so i dont know how it ended up in my zen micro but I just have one paragraph stuck. Chinese love song of sorts again haha. Songs can really change your mood and make you thin about things. So Ive been thinking...

爱我别走
如果你说你不爱我
不要听见你真的说出口
再给我一点温柔

Anyone can find me the artiste who sang this song? It's a guy. Thats all i know, and the title is (duhz) -> "爱我别走"

Why do weapons exist? Humans are the only creatures to plot and scheme so detailedly agaisnt each other. Weapons are made and meant for killing they say. But why can weapons be used to bring about about a age where weapons are not necessary? Even if it is naturally inborn for humans to fight, fighting it seems fighting gives people a sense of fufilment. I will strive to live till the day weapons are no longer necessary, EVEN to enforce the peace because there is no reason to shatter it. That is the ideal world I want to build and be part of. Idealistic? Impossible? Maybe, maybe not.

I have made my stand before that I wont comment on world issues and such here on my blog so dont expect to see anything about Terri or the newest earthquake or any other kind of news unless some war breaks out. Especially if it involves the middle east / Israel for that is the sign.. of the beginning of the end of tomorrow.

This morning, i thought I was going to die. My heart was pounding insanely loud and my head was bursting with pain. I could hear / feel my heartbeat throughout my body as my vision blurred a little, my breathing in gasps, breaths going in but no air touching my lungs through my parched lips / throat and a sharp pain pierced my heart. Real pain, like a stab, I had to steady myself before carrying on to walk to the carpark. How scary... I thought I was going to collapse and die until my breathing began to go back to normal but the headache lasted the entire day. NOT a happy experience.

Thats all up to here it is like 1 am and I have school tomorrow, till we meet again... ciao

Quote of the Post:
In my heart of hearts
I know I could never love again
Ive lost everything, everything
Everything that matters to me, matters in this world...