One Ring
I got a little ring,
its nothing more then that
Tiny sliver of silver
around my hand it wraps
This piece of metal
betrays its weight, its mass
The fullness of responsibility within that ring it rests
Just one complete circle
More a seal then gate to me
Even if it is by choice
Only I can set me free
Its not the ring that holds me
surely not its marks
but treat it as a lesson
of what could have become
I have a little ring
I wear it on my finger
It is a sign to me
Just wait a little longer
I had a little ring
I wore it on my finger
Its echoes sing to me
A future that is no longer
-----------------------------------
Its been a few long days. We'll probably never meet again as long as I live. I intend to keep my pledge, not the best I can but the way it ought to. Resign, Resign- those wandering eyes.
My God is an awesome God he reigns, from heaven above with wisdom, power and love. My God is an awesome God.
I have nothing left to say. All I can do is wait things out and and keep my head on. Merry Christmas everyone, I'll be looking forward to the new year.
Quote of e Post:
Alcohol is fluid misery
Monday, December 24, 2007
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Book Out 01
Les Miserables - On My Own
Now I'm all alone again,
Nowhere to turn, no one to go to.
Without a home, without a friend,
Without a face to say hello to.
And now the night is near,
Now I can make believe he's here.
Sometimes I walk alone at night
When everybody else is sleeping.
I think of him, and then I'm happy
With the company I'm keeping.
The city goes to bed,
And I can live inside my head.
On my own,
Pretending he's beside me.
All alone,
I walk with him till morning.
Without him,
I feel his arms around me,
And when I lose my way I close my eyes
And he has found me.
In the rain,
The pavement shines like silver.
All the lights
Are misty in the river.
In the darkness,
The trees are full of starlight,
And all I see is him and me for ever and forever.
And I know
It's only in my mind,
That I'm talking to myself
And not to him.
And although I know that he is blind,
Still I say,
There's a way for us.
I love him,
But when the night is over,
He is gone,
The river's just a river.
Without him,
The world around me changes.
The trees are bare and everywhere
The streets are full of strangers.
I love him,
But every day I'm learning,
All my life,
I've only been pretending!
Without me,
His world will go on turning,
A world that's full of happiness
That I have never known!
I love him...
I love him...
I love him...
But only on my own...
---------------------------------------
Just change all the "him"s to "her". My first book out! I've been gone for 2 weeks and its been pretty cool! I'm not authorized and am not allowed to divulge anything to do with my training to anyone who isn't related to MINDEF or the SAF. So other then other NSF and the like I'm sorry but I can't share. BUT my dear Eliza will know everything- I love her dearly.
I'm just happy to be out here. Blog more some other time.
Quote of e Post:
And I know
It's only in my mind,
That I'm talking to myself
And not to her.
Now I'm all alone again,
Nowhere to turn, no one to go to.
Without a home, without a friend,
Without a face to say hello to.
And now the night is near,
Now I can make believe he's here.
Sometimes I walk alone at night
When everybody else is sleeping.
I think of him, and then I'm happy
With the company I'm keeping.
The city goes to bed,
And I can live inside my head.
On my own,
Pretending he's beside me.
All alone,
I walk with him till morning.
Without him,
I feel his arms around me,
And when I lose my way I close my eyes
And he has found me.
In the rain,
The pavement shines like silver.
All the lights
Are misty in the river.
In the darkness,
The trees are full of starlight,
And all I see is him and me for ever and forever.
And I know
It's only in my mind,
That I'm talking to myself
And not to him.
And although I know that he is blind,
Still I say,
There's a way for us.
I love him,
But when the night is over,
He is gone,
The river's just a river.
Without him,
The world around me changes.
The trees are bare and everywhere
The streets are full of strangers.
I love him,
But every day I'm learning,
All my life,
I've only been pretending!
Without me,
His world will go on turning,
A world that's full of happiness
That I have never known!
I love him...
I love him...
I love him...
But only on my own...
---------------------------------------
Just change all the "him"s to "her". My first book out! I've been gone for 2 weeks and its been pretty cool! I'm not authorized and am not allowed to divulge anything to do with my training to anyone who isn't related to MINDEF or the SAF. So other then other NSF and the like I'm sorry but I can't share. BUT my dear Eliza will know everything- I love her dearly.
I'm just happy to be out here. Blog more some other time.
Quote of e Post:
And I know
It's only in my mind,
That I'm talking to myself
And not to her.
Monday, December 03, 2007
What does a sane man do in an insane society?
Its not everyday you come online and get a fresh revelation that your days are numbered. And that you haven't made a difference in the world. And that you haven't done much with the time you've had thus far- Even for those who make this time the best it can be.
"Lucky lucky you, to be young again"
"Out of time, out of luck"
It was 2am and I really didn't feel like explaining myself there and then. You're really a lucky guy you see. At least, you have time to wait things out, and she's still single, receptive and within reach. You're not spending the last 3 days of your free life fretting over whats going to come, and you have friends who support what you're doing. I'm out of time, out of luck and all out of guts.
I told you that love songs aren't good for self control. And that rules are rules and one has no choice but to wait. But I can't abide personally. And its different. Authentic legality is more burdensome then forbidden fruit, calls, lies and video tapes.- because everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial.
For these 2 days at least, I hope you will still have me. While you're burying your loneliness killing pixels, blasting songs and moping around, remember me, as I will remember you. We're all not as different as we make ourselves out to be.
The immersing nature of the media is just how Big Brother has evolved today. Its true, just like in the novel. Whips, chains and fire have been replaced by movies. magazines and music- laws and restrictions just aren't as persuasive as passive indoctrination. "Big Brother isn’t watching. He’s singing and dancing…With everyone’s imagination atrophied, no one will ever be a threat to the world." Your attempts at personal expression through buying, saying, listening and doing what you want is exactly the "free will" corporations and commercials want you to have. Emo teens listening to sad songs will write self effacing poems and pour billions into the coffers of pharmaceutical companies who manufacture ineffective antidepressants. Spunky and adventurous young men and women will sign up for package tours to remote locations and line the pockets of airline and travel agencies. Connoisseurs of fine dining will flood to small and overpriced celebrity restaurants upon recommendation to sample exotic fair and fuel a cycle of waste and excess.
Epicurus may have been about 2360 years early but his philosophy is precisely what people think is the way things ought to be run today, and how governments and companies are glad to market that ideal. Conspiracy theorists are having a field day simply because their theories are has heretical as the idea that the world is round. We clamor for the truth but the truth really isn't what we want to know. How real is the truth as we see it, depends on how profitable the figures pulling the strings of the world deem it to be. I'm not saying we're never alone. But what I am saying is that you should never, for a single moment, think that you're an individual with am undeniable right and freedom to expression, belief and practice.
You're lucky, because you have a mom and a dad and a sister and brothers who love you. Because you live a normal life in a slightly abnormal world. Because your mother isn't a crazy psychotic who thinks the entire world is out to ruin her plans, throwing away random things and conducting strip searches on you to prove you're really her son and not an imitation. Because your father isn't pouring his money into a get rich scheme involving health products and diet pills that is supposed to help the family after retirement. Because your sister isn't a well sheltered fool whose world revolves around herself and her selfish desires. Because you can love your sister and be assured you can trust her simply because she isn't like a spy for your mother. Because you don't have to live with the knowledge that after you get your exam results back you're not going to be able to go to university. Because the girl you love does not have friends who are trying their hardest to stop you from getting near to her. Because the girl you love is still single and does not talk to you about how wonderful her boyfriend is. Because you aren't struggling with the concept that you may not really be in love but just in love with the concept of being in love. Because even though your friends have left for a while they still miss you enough to care. Because- just because life hasn't seemed to turn its back on you.
Will you even read this and shed a single tear?
I don't dream of living a great life, I lie to dream great dreams.
You have no one to talk to? Well, neither do i.
The Click Five - All I need is you
You're scared
It shows
Been there
You're not prepared to be
In love
With me
So soon cause you've been through enough to have
Something hold you back
We don't need to go that far
Let's hold on to where we are
If it's real we'll make it through
Cause all I need is you
They say
Don't waste
Your time
They're obviously blind
So let's
Forget
The words the thoughts they put into your head
Don't give up just yet
We don't need to go that far
Let's hold on to where we are
If it's real we'll make it through
Cause all I need is you
We don't need the world right now
We got time to work it out
Hold on tight, I'll hold on too
Cause all I need is --
Baby, maybe we should start somewhere
Baby, let me in your heart
Before we fall apart
We don't need to go too far
Let's hold on to who we are
If it's real we'll make it through
Cause all I need is you
We don't need the world right now
We got time to work it out
Hold on tight, I'll hold on too
Cause all I need is you
All I need is you
All I need is you
--------------------------------------------
We just don't see how God fits anywhere in this puzzle.
Quote of e Post:
We don't need to go too far
Let's hold on to where we are
"Lucky lucky you, to be young again"
"Out of time, out of luck"
It was 2am and I really didn't feel like explaining myself there and then. You're really a lucky guy you see. At least, you have time to wait things out, and she's still single, receptive and within reach. You're not spending the last 3 days of your free life fretting over whats going to come, and you have friends who support what you're doing. I'm out of time, out of luck and all out of guts.
I told you that love songs aren't good for self control. And that rules are rules and one has no choice but to wait. But I can't abide personally. And its different. Authentic legality is more burdensome then forbidden fruit, calls, lies and video tapes.- because everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial.
For these 2 days at least, I hope you will still have me. While you're burying your loneliness killing pixels, blasting songs and moping around, remember me, as I will remember you. We're all not as different as we make ourselves out to be.
The immersing nature of the media is just how Big Brother has evolved today. Its true, just like in the novel. Whips, chains and fire have been replaced by movies. magazines and music- laws and restrictions just aren't as persuasive as passive indoctrination. "Big Brother isn’t watching. He’s singing and dancing…With everyone’s imagination atrophied, no one will ever be a threat to the world." Your attempts at personal expression through buying, saying, listening and doing what you want is exactly the "free will" corporations and commercials want you to have. Emo teens listening to sad songs will write self effacing poems and pour billions into the coffers of pharmaceutical companies who manufacture ineffective antidepressants. Spunky and adventurous young men and women will sign up for package tours to remote locations and line the pockets of airline and travel agencies. Connoisseurs of fine dining will flood to small and overpriced celebrity restaurants upon recommendation to sample exotic fair and fuel a cycle of waste and excess.
Epicurus may have been about 2360 years early but his philosophy is precisely what people think is the way things ought to be run today, and how governments and companies are glad to market that ideal. Conspiracy theorists are having a field day simply because their theories are has heretical as the idea that the world is round. We clamor for the truth but the truth really isn't what we want to know. How real is the truth as we see it, depends on how profitable the figures pulling the strings of the world deem it to be. I'm not saying we're never alone. But what I am saying is that you should never, for a single moment, think that you're an individual with am undeniable right and freedom to expression, belief and practice.
You're lucky, because you have a mom and a dad and a sister and brothers who love you. Because you live a normal life in a slightly abnormal world. Because your mother isn't a crazy psychotic who thinks the entire world is out to ruin her plans, throwing away random things and conducting strip searches on you to prove you're really her son and not an imitation. Because your father isn't pouring his money into a get rich scheme involving health products and diet pills that is supposed to help the family after retirement. Because your sister isn't a well sheltered fool whose world revolves around herself and her selfish desires. Because you can love your sister and be assured you can trust her simply because she isn't like a spy for your mother. Because you don't have to live with the knowledge that after you get your exam results back you're not going to be able to go to university. Because the girl you love does not have friends who are trying their hardest to stop you from getting near to her. Because the girl you love is still single and does not talk to you about how wonderful her boyfriend is. Because you aren't struggling with the concept that you may not really be in love but just in love with the concept of being in love. Because even though your friends have left for a while they still miss you enough to care. Because- just because life hasn't seemed to turn its back on you.
Will you even read this and shed a single tear?
I don't dream of living a great life, I lie to dream great dreams.
You have no one to talk to? Well, neither do i.
The Click Five - All I need is you
You're scared
It shows
Been there
You're not prepared to be
In love
With me
So soon cause you've been through enough to have
Something hold you back
We don't need to go that far
Let's hold on to where we are
If it's real we'll make it through
Cause all I need is you
They say
Don't waste
Your time
They're obviously blind
So let's
Forget
The words the thoughts they put into your head
Don't give up just yet
We don't need to go that far
Let's hold on to where we are
If it's real we'll make it through
Cause all I need is you
We don't need the world right now
We got time to work it out
Hold on tight, I'll hold on too
Cause all I need is --
Baby, maybe we should start somewhere
Baby, let me in your heart
Before we fall apart
We don't need to go too far
Let's hold on to who we are
If it's real we'll make it through
Cause all I need is you
We don't need the world right now
We got time to work it out
Hold on tight, I'll hold on too
Cause all I need is you
All I need is you
All I need is you
--------------------------------------------
We just don't see how God fits anywhere in this puzzle.
Quote of e Post:
We don't need to go too far
Let's hold on to where we are
Thursday, November 29, 2007
When I'm gone
The Click five - When I'm Gone
Dear love
Better sit down
Bad news
Get the word out
Accidents come with conclusions
I'm numb
On the asphalt
Don't cry
Wasn't your fault
I can't feel
It's just confusion
Keep on, keep on, keep on, when I'm gone
When the lights are out
Don't be sad for long
When I'm gone
And the lights are out
I'll be shining on
I'm just gonna let my life bleed on this letter
Let my song sing on forever
I'll still love you when I'm gone
Tear drops
Paint the faces
Despair
Is contagious
Dressed in black
Clutching a red rose
Hold on, hold on, hold on, my love goes on
When the lights are out
Don't be sad for long
When I'm gone
And the lights are out
I'll be shining on
I'm just gonna let my life bleed on this letter
Let my song sing on forever
I'll still love you when I'm gone
When the lights are out
Don't be sad for long
When I'm gone
And the lights are out
I'll be shining on
I'm just gonna let my life bleed on this letter
Let my song sing on forever
I'll still love you when I'm gone
When the lights are out
Don't be sad for long
When I'm gone
And the lights are out
I'll be shining on
I'm just gonna let my life bleed on this letter
Let my song sing on forever
I'll still love you when I'm gone
---------------------------------------------------
Yea, this is just what I was trying to say. 8 more days left. I'm sure going to miss the outside world plenty *sniff* but we'll be fine, and we'll keep smiling, regardless. always.
I'm tired. Its 2am and I want to sleep. All I do is sleep all day, and think of you~
Edited at 2:17am: I just read something new. Ugh, now I'm conflicted again. Gah.
Quote of e Post:
Let my song sing on forever
I'll still love you when I'm gone
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Red Carpet
Wheet! I'm back from prom! Haha, it was kind of fun to be honest :P But I didn't go to the after party, since I don't drink, can't dance and get a headache from loud music and shit like that. Plus I kept feeling like I was gonna puke at any time- but I really really really wanted to go and see what its like! At least with this bunch I'd know practically everyone haha. Pictures will come some other time, I'm too bloody lazy to upload them now.
Ohh it was craziness! So stupid, the emcee was an idiot, he has lousy English and can't count to save his ass. Vanessa did a much better job in the 30 seconds or so she was up there announcing prom king. And Pamela won Prom Queen! Her dress today was so pretty! *GUSH* but prom king was like some huh-who-is-that from some Science class haha. For nominees regardless of competition be it prom king/queen or mr/miss stylish majority of them were all from the Arts. We have fashion sense, and a zest for life- HA BEAT THAT :P ARTS FOREVER!
Oh and someone at our table won stuff at the lucky draw. Considering its like 9 prizes out of 300+ people I'd say it was pretty nifty. She won like 2 (or was it 4?) tickets to a MCR concert but meh, I'm not interested and I'm not free either way. Crack, I would have wanted to win the 10 free movie passes or iPod Touch =P Oh well~ Oh and this reminds me again... I'M DEAD BROKE D: GAHH Stupid taxi fare... Then again, since it was already past 12am I might as well have gone for the party and partied till 6am and share cab back so its cheaper... riiigghhhttt I'm not that adventurous haha. I think.
I just might go try just once before I go into army, maybe. Haha, dang you Crystal! I'd so gonna enjoy myself on Tekong! Haha, and Raynor's throwing an early Christmas party (like before I go in? hmm :P) and Thebes Gamma might be meeting again so my nuimbered days are getting filled up pretty fast haha. Whee, sometimes I just love my life. Now if only money weren't an option- I need to get RICH haha! (Okay I definitely know its rubbing off me, ignore the OOCness)
Christmas is coming! And Christmas means I can come out! Whee! Army life don't seem so bad all of a sudden, at least not in comparison to like prison or some other things because the army truly is focused on training you. And you do get to slack alot in the right situations. It just may be the "funnest"two years of my life yet. Hoo Ha!
In the midst of all this highness I must remind myself to uphold my old friend in prayer. Father Lord, You know the situation he has gotten himself into, may Your divine intervention provide him a way out when there seems no way. Unlock hidden paths and lead him from this time of his impending demise so that he may finally see Your power and glory for what it is. May Your precious blood protect my dear friend and your spirit comfort his heart in this time of trial. In Jesus's name, Amen.
Hang in there man, justice will prevail. You'll turn out just fine, and even if you do get convicted, its not the end.
I so wish I were totally wasted right now- Gragghhh I love my class <3 2a02
Quote of e Post:
I know who I want to take me home
Ohh it was craziness! So stupid, the emcee was an idiot, he has lousy English and can't count to save his ass. Vanessa did a much better job in the 30 seconds or so she was up there announcing prom king. And Pamela won Prom Queen! Her dress today was so pretty! *GUSH* but prom king was like some huh-who-is-that from some Science class haha. For nominees regardless of competition be it prom king/queen or mr/miss stylish majority of them were all from the Arts. We have fashion sense, and a zest for life- HA BEAT THAT :P ARTS FOREVER!
Oh and someone at our table won stuff at the lucky draw. Considering its like 9 prizes out of 300+ people I'd say it was pretty nifty. She won like 2 (or was it 4?) tickets to a MCR concert but meh, I'm not interested and I'm not free either way. Crack, I would have wanted to win the 10 free movie passes or iPod Touch =P Oh well~ Oh and this reminds me again... I'M DEAD BROKE D: GAHH Stupid taxi fare... Then again, since it was already past 12am I might as well have gone for the party and partied till 6am and share cab back so its cheaper... riiigghhhttt I'm not that adventurous haha. I think.
I just might go try just once before I go into army, maybe. Haha, dang you Crystal! I'd so gonna enjoy myself on Tekong! Haha, and Raynor's throwing an early Christmas party (like before I go in? hmm :P) and Thebes Gamma might be meeting again so my nuimbered days are getting filled up pretty fast haha. Whee, sometimes I just love my life. Now if only money weren't an option- I need to get RICH haha! (Okay I definitely know its rubbing off me, ignore the OOCness)
Christmas is coming! And Christmas means I can come out! Whee! Army life don't seem so bad all of a sudden, at least not in comparison to like prison or some other things because the army truly is focused on training you. And you do get to slack alot in the right situations. It just may be the "funnest"two years of my life yet. Hoo Ha!
In the midst of all this highness I must remind myself to uphold my old friend in prayer. Father Lord, You know the situation he has gotten himself into, may Your divine intervention provide him a way out when there seems no way. Unlock hidden paths and lead him from this time of his impending demise so that he may finally see Your power and glory for what it is. May Your precious blood protect my dear friend and your spirit comfort his heart in this time of trial. In Jesus's name, Amen.
Hang in there man, justice will prevail. You'll turn out just fine, and even if you do get convicted, its not the end.
I so wish I were totally wasted right now- Gragghhh I love my class <3 2a02
Quote of e Post:
I know who I want to take me home
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Pre-Prom
That was the last one. Aw- Prom is tonight (its already 2am) but I'm so not hyped up about going. No offense meant, but why would I want to go for an event where everyone is all dressed up when I'm stuck staying with (other) socially defunct guys? And she's half the school (more) isn't even going anyway, isn't prom supposed to be a social event? I'm disappointed and maybe even dreading the event, I ought not to have paid after all.
Lord I dedicate this prayer to all university students who are taking their examinations now, let them all have an easy time validating their years as an undergrad and give them your blessings as they leave for the working world armed with at least a first class honors (I don't really know whats considered a good ranking so this should be it). May your presence and peace cover them from head to toe as they enter the examination venue, saturate their mind with your wisdom and peace that transcends all humane understanding as they prepare to bring glory to your name. In Jesus's holy and precious name, amen.
Kings of Convenience - Love is No Big Truth
All I do is sleep all day,
and think of you.
A memory of the cushioned life
I'm clinging to.
The image of a mutual one, our haven.
The sombre chords of our song,
the fading.
Love is no big truth,
driven by our genes,
we are simple selfish beings.
A symphony that's you,
joyously awaking the ignorant and sleeping.
Passion and its brother hate,
they come and go.
Could easily be made
to stay for longer though.
Many people play this game
so willingly,
do I have to be like them,
or be lonely?
Love is no big truth,
driven by our genes,
we are simple selfish beings.
A symphony that's you,
joyously awaking the ignorant and sleeping.
Another view of what there is to it,
getting me through it.
I'll never need it again.
I'll never need it again.
I'll never need it again.
I'll never need it again.
I'll never need it again.
I'll never need it again.
I'll never need it again.
----------------------------------------------
Yea right, I wish. D: God save me.
Quote of e Post:
Do I have to be like them,
or be lonely?
Lord I dedicate this prayer to all university students who are taking their examinations now, let them all have an easy time validating their years as an undergrad and give them your blessings as they leave for the working world armed with at least a first class honors (I don't really know whats considered a good ranking so this should be it). May your presence and peace cover them from head to toe as they enter the examination venue, saturate their mind with your wisdom and peace that transcends all humane understanding as they prepare to bring glory to your name. In Jesus's holy and precious name, amen.
Kings of Convenience - Love is No Big Truth
All I do is sleep all day,
and think of you.
A memory of the cushioned life
I'm clinging to.
The image of a mutual one, our haven.
The sombre chords of our song,
the fading.
Love is no big truth,
driven by our genes,
we are simple selfish beings.
A symphony that's you,
joyously awaking the ignorant and sleeping.
Passion and its brother hate,
they come and go.
Could easily be made
to stay for longer though.
Many people play this game
so willingly,
do I have to be like them,
or be lonely?
Love is no big truth,
driven by our genes,
we are simple selfish beings.
A symphony that's you,
joyously awaking the ignorant and sleeping.
Another view of what there is to it,
getting me through it.
I'll never need it again.
I'll never need it again.
I'll never need it again.
I'll never need it again.
I'll never need it again.
I'll never need it again.
I'll never need it again.
----------------------------------------------
Yea right, I wish. D: God save me.
Quote of e Post:
Do I have to be like them,
or be lonely?
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Kiss me and stay with me
ANNA inspi' NANA (BLACK STONES) - Stand By Me
Long way to go
Nagai michi wo aruki nagara tsubuyaita
Konna watashi de gomen ne to
Mujaki na butterfly
Fly into the blue sky
> Long way to go
> I walk a long way while muttering
> that I'm sorry for this kind of myself.
> Innocent butterfly,
> Fly into the blue sky.
Hitori de kanashimi ni kure koboreru namida
Tsumetakute
Amari ni nagai yamiyo ga
Me wo samasu
> By myself, tears spill sadly at nightfall
> It's Cold...
> An excessively long, dark night
> Opens my eyes
Kanashi sugite kurushikute
Subete nagedashita
Demo anata wa aishite kureta
> Sadness passes by painfully.
> But I suddenly throw it all away
> Because you loved me...
Kiss me & stay with me
Towa ni saku hana awaku hakanaku tsuyoku
How could you smile for me
Nani mo nakute ii
Zutto soba ni ite hoshii
Zutto soba de stand by me
> Kiss me & stay with me
> A flower blooming in eternity moves on, fleeting strongly
> How could you smile for me
> It's fine not to do anything
> I want to forever be beside you
> Always closely stand by me
Sotto hoho wo nadeta
Anata no nukumori
Yasashikute
Shizuka na ai no gen’ei
Me wo samasu
> You softly caressed my cheek
> Your warmth...
> It's gentle...
> A silent love of illusions...
> Opens my eyes
Hito wa yowaku zankoku de
Oroka na ikimono
Demo anata wa yurushite kureta
> I was a weak, brutal person
> A foolish being...
> But you forgave me...
Kiss me & say good bye
Tozasareta hana yowaku setsunaku hibiku
How could you cry for me
Kataranakute ii
Zutto soba ni ite hoshii
Zutto soba de smiling for me
> Kiss me & say good bye
> A closed-up flower rings out weakly and sadly
> How could you cry for me
> It's fine not to say anything
> I want to forever be beside you
> Always be beside me, smiling for me...
Kiss me & stay with me
Towa ni saku hana awaku hakanaku tsuyoku
How could you smile for me
Nani mo nakute ii
Zutto soba ni ite hoshii
> Kiss me & stay with me
> A flower blooming in eternity moves on, fleeting strongly
> How could you smile for me
> It's fine not to do anything
> I want to forever be beside you
Kiss me & say good bye
Tozasareta hana yowaku setsunaku hibiku
How could you cry for me
Kataranakute ii
Zutto soba ni ite hoshii
Zutto soba de smiling for me
> Kiss me & say good bye
> A closed-up flower rings out weakly and sadly
> How could you cry for me
> It's fine not to say anything
> I want to forever be beside you
> Always be beside me, smiling for me...
-------------------------------------------------------
Hands down my favorite song out of all the openings and endings.
Its been some time huh? One week has passed and A levels are already officially over. My last 13 days of freedom has begun and two have passed. Eleven more days to go, minus one for prom and that leaves ten.
Yesterday was super fun, preparing everything for the final round of cooking today. Happy Birthday Elhannah :) Today was a miraculous day. It was a day that no word less then miraculous can describe sufficiently (pre-army vibes robbing me of my vocabulary, flair suffocating~ dying urgh) all the awesomeness of one 25/11/07.
Even though the day started as early as 6.30am the first spark of awesomeness came even before the day officially began and I guess that started the entire day's momentum rolling :D I woke up with a sharp deep rooted aching in my entire right forearm, it was so bad I couldn't sleep for more then an hour or two but it went away without me noticing it while I worked :) Praise God!
There was less cooking to be done so it was far less strenuous and plenty more fun. Washing Dutch Ovens have always been a hair raising affair but after so much practice, it sticks and yea, may even be kind of fun. And I try to avaid doing the shortening because it ruins my hands (hey, im sorry for sounding so gu niang) but it is fun haha. Or maybe I was just tired and high on inhaling vapour from the dutch ovens (mmm claypot rice or is it liquid crisco? haha)
And service was fabulous. Even if I was sleepy throughout the sermon, I believe the altar call was a divine intervention by God Himself. The conditions were perfect and the time was ripe. Nothing else matters.
So many songs ot put up so little time/space. I <3 my Eliza:) Mai-waifu-is-da-best-in-da-world-slam!!
Quote of e Post:
How could you cry for me
Saturday, November 17, 2007
What can I believe in?
Anna inspi' Nana (BlackStones) - KUROI NAMIDA
Asu nante konai you ni to
Negatta yoru kazoe kirenai
Yume mo ai mo nakushi
Ame ni utareta mama
Naiteru...
> Wishing tonight that tomorrow will never come
> Countless dreams and loves and losses,
> I cry and cry and cry
> As though beaten down by rain
Kazari tsuke nai de kono mama no watashi de ikite yuku tame
Nani ga hitsuyo wo
Jibun sae shinjirezu nani wo shinjitara ii no
Kotae wa chikasugite mienai
> Don't display me, not like this
> I need something to keep on living
> If I can't even believe in myself, what can I believe in?
> The answer is so close I can't even see it
Kuroi namida nagasu watashi ni wa
Nanimo nakute kanashii sugite
Kotoba ni sae nara nakute
Karada juu ga itami dashite
Taerarenai hitori de wa
> Shedding black tears
> I am nothing. Filled with sorrow,
> Unable to say a word
> The pain is welling up inside me, and
> I can't bear this alone
Yonaka ni naki tsukarete
Egaita jibun janai jibun no kao
Yowasa wo kakushita mama egao wo tsukuru no wa
Yameyou...
> I cried in the middle of the night
> Drew my face that isn't me
> That hides my weaknesses
> I'm going to stop smiling...
Kazari tsuke nai de ikite yuku koto wa kono yo de ichiban
Muzukashii koto?
Anata kara morau nara katachi no nai mono ga ii
Kowareru mono wa mou iranai
> Don't display me. Is the hardest thing in the whole world
> To keep on living?
> If it comes from you, then it's all right that it's intangible
> I don't want things that can be broken anymore
Kuroi namida nagashi sakendemo
Shiranu kao de ashita wa kite
Onnaji itami ni butsukaru
Sonna hibi wo tsuzukeru nara
Tooku kiete shimaitai
Wagamama to wakattemo...
> Shedding black tears, crying out
> Tomorrow comes with a face that I don't know
> Struck with this same pain again
> If I have to continue like this, every day,
> Then I want to disappear forever, far away
> I know it's selfish, but...
Kuroi namida nagasu watashi ni wa
Nanimo nakute kanashi sugite
Kotoba ni sae nara nakute
Karada juu ga itami dashite
> Shedding black tears
> I am nothing. Filled with sorrow,
> Unable to say a word
> The pain is welling up inside me, and
> I can't bear this alone
Kuroi namida nagashi sakendemo
Shiranu kao de ashita wa kite
Onnaji itami ni butsukaru
Sonna hibi wo tsuzukeru nara
Boku kiete shimaitai
Wagamama to wakattemo...
> Shedding black tears, crying out
> Tomorrow comes with a face that I don't know
> Struck with this same pain again
> If I have to continue like this, every day,
> Then I want to disappear forever, far away
> I know that it's selfish, but...
---------------------------------------------
Yay! I'm back lol. But my legs are killing me, I haven't exercised in months haha. But that was really good, to just walk and spend time with these people I haven't worked with in months. I can't remember how much I miss rangers.
Tomorrow's the BIG DAY! Everyone rest up ( have to sleep soon so I can be in church by 6.30am) and get ready for a long and tiring day. For Thailand, for Rangers, for God!
On Friday for cell George was the guest speaker and he did a (rather sketchy) survey based on our 5 Love Languages. I got an abnormally high score on my primary language, which turned out to be Acts of Service followed by my secondary (rather high too) Quality Time. Which is kind of unexpected and strange like. Because George explained that if your Love Language is eg. X, you'd be more inclined to show others you care by doing X, because to you that is the best way of showing your love for them. And I rationalized it a little and I find that it may be true.
Words of affirmation can easily be lies and gift giving entails you a certain debt to the giver. Physical touch is totally freaky and I have many issues about that (stay like damn far away from me). But time spent and doing things together/for each other is a very real, personal and tangible thing that is difficult to fake, because you spend your time, life and effort; things that are irreplaceable to you, in the lives of others. And you're literally sharing your life with them, and as a concept, thats awesome, really.
I don't know, could that be the reason why? I really am not so sure anymore.
Quote of the Post:
I am nothing. Filled with sorrow, Unable to say a word.
Run Run Run!
Im going to go hiking tomorrow! And get re-acquainted with my old friend the Dutch Oven (horror) Haha. Can hardly wait. Must go rest now, updates tmr.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Can you wake me?
Winter Sleep- Olivia inspi' Reira (TRAPNEST)
It keeps coming back to me
I remember this pain
It spreads across my eyes
Everything is dull
Everyone's smiling, they're smiling
It pushes me far, oh far away
I can not understand
Everything is blue
Can you hear me out there?
Will you hold me now...
Hold me now
My frozen heart
I'm gazing from the distance and...
I feel everything pass through me
I can't be alone right now
Will you hold me now
Hold me now
My frozen heart
I'm lost in a deep winter sleep
I can't seem to find my way out alone
Can you wake me
I know when I let it in
It hides love from this moment
So I guard it close
I watch the moves it makes
But it gets me, but it gets me
I wish I could understand how I
Could make it disappear...
Make it disappear
Anyone out there hear me now?
Will you hold me now
Hold me now
My frozen heart
Kiss my lips and maybe you can
Take me to your world for now
I can't be alone right now
Will you hold me now
Hold me now
My frozen heart
Please make it all go away
Am I ever gonna feel myself again?
I hope I will...
Will you hold me now...
Hold me now
My frozen heart
I'm gazing from the distance and...
I feel everything pass through me
I can't be alone right now
Will you hold me now
Hold me now
My frozen heart
I'm lost in a deep winter sleep
I can't seem to find my way out alone...
Can you wake me?
---------------------------------------------
Pardon the bad video, no one seems to like to upload a decent version of it. (Decent ie. non weeaboo)
History bombed. Don't want to talk about it. To me... A LEVELS ARE OVER!! RAWR :D Can someone spell PARTY TIME? Actually I dont know what to do really. Just do what I used to do normally?
I must screenshot this- I've never seen all three of you online at the same time. One is tough enough, I won't speak to any. Lets mark that date down, 29th Dec.
I can't remember what I was talking about anymore. Boo.
Quote of e Post:
I can't be alone right now
Monday, November 12, 2007
I reached into the sky
Lit was alright, it was fun even. A poem from our J1 assignment came out as one of the A-level comparative text xD Awesome winnage. 4 more papers to go, halfway mark broken!
Olivia inspi' REIRA - Starless night
I reached into the sky
Omoi wa todokanakute
Chiisaku sora ni kieta
Irotoridori no fuusen
> I reached into the sky
> My love wouldn't reach you
> The multi-colored balloons
> Disappeared into the sky, growing smaller and smaller
I'm alone
Ikisaki no nai watashi no te wo
Sotto tsunaide kureta
> I'm alone
> I had no destination
> But you gently held my hand
Starless night kako no kage furi kaeranai
Kanjitai anata no nukumori
Tears are falling down mayotte mo hanashi wa shinai
Tsunaida anata no te wo
> Starless night, I won’t look back on the shadow of my past
> I want to feel your warmth
> Tears are falling down; even when I'm lost
> I won't let go of your hand
Sometimes we fall apart
Okubyou ni natte shimau kedo
Kitto hito wa soko kara nanika wo mitsuke daseru hazu
> Sometimes we fall apart
> We become cowards
> But surely we find something there
Take my hand
Moroku fukanzen na futari dakara
Zutto te wo tsunaide iru
> Take my hand
> It’s because the two of us are fragile and imperfect
> That we'll stay holding hands forever
Starless night kuchibiru ga yowane haite mo
Shinjitai anata no nukumori
Endless love mujun sae aiseteru no wa
You are my shining star
> Starless night, Though complaints may cross my lips
> I want to believe in your warmth
> Endless love, I can love even my faults
> Because you are my shining star
Starless night kako no kage furi kaeranai
Kanjitai anata no nukumori
Tears are falling down mayotte mo hanashi wa shinai
Tsunaida anata wo
> Starless night, I won’t look back on the shadow of my past
> I want to feel your warmth
> Tears falling down; even when I'm lost
> I won't let go of your hand
Starless night kuchibiru ga yowane haite mo
Shinjitai anata no nukumori
Endless love mujun sae aiseteru no wa
You are my shining star
You are my shining star
> Starless night, Though complaints may cross my lips
> I want to believe in your warmth
> Endless love, I can love even my faults
> Because you are my shining star
> You are my shining star
--------------------------------------------
It was all over so long ago so why do you still appear in my dreams? Someone is sporting a new hairstyle, and I like it. Alot. Damn you- shoo shoo go away. isimplyhateyou..
Eliza-chan, tell me, what should I do?
Quote of e Post:
I want to feel your warmth
Olivia inspi' REIRA - Starless night
I reached into the sky
Omoi wa todokanakute
Chiisaku sora ni kieta
Irotoridori no fuusen
> I reached into the sky
> My love wouldn't reach you
> The multi-colored balloons
> Disappeared into the sky, growing smaller and smaller
I'm alone
Ikisaki no nai watashi no te wo
Sotto tsunaide kureta
> I'm alone
> I had no destination
> But you gently held my hand
Starless night kako no kage furi kaeranai
Kanjitai anata no nukumori
Tears are falling down mayotte mo hanashi wa shinai
Tsunaida anata no te wo
> Starless night, I won’t look back on the shadow of my past
> I want to feel your warmth
> Tears are falling down; even when I'm lost
> I won't let go of your hand
Sometimes we fall apart
Okubyou ni natte shimau kedo
Kitto hito wa soko kara nanika wo mitsuke daseru hazu
> Sometimes we fall apart
> We become cowards
> But surely we find something there
Take my hand
Moroku fukanzen na futari dakara
Zutto te wo tsunaide iru
> Take my hand
> It’s because the two of us are fragile and imperfect
> That we'll stay holding hands forever
Starless night kuchibiru ga yowane haite mo
Shinjitai anata no nukumori
Endless love mujun sae aiseteru no wa
You are my shining star
> Starless night, Though complaints may cross my lips
> I want to believe in your warmth
> Endless love, I can love even my faults
> Because you are my shining star
Starless night kako no kage furi kaeranai
Kanjitai anata no nukumori
Tears are falling down mayotte mo hanashi wa shinai
Tsunaida anata wo
> Starless night, I won’t look back on the shadow of my past
> I want to feel your warmth
> Tears falling down; even when I'm lost
> I won't let go of your hand
Starless night kuchibiru ga yowane haite mo
Shinjitai anata no nukumori
Endless love mujun sae aiseteru no wa
You are my shining star
You are my shining star
> Starless night, Though complaints may cross my lips
> I want to believe in your warmth
> Endless love, I can love even my faults
> Because you are my shining star
> You are my shining star
--------------------------------------------
Eliza-chan, tell me, what should I do?
Quote of e Post:
I want to feel your warmth
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Can you feel me now?
Oh yea, I realized I haven't blogged in like 10 days and I've been meaning to, just haven't gotten down to actually doing it. Now I can't remember all the things I want to blog about~ meh.
Lets backtrack (lets see... last post was 1st Nov) so yea, history paper 2 and math on 2nd Nov. Damn Cambridge, you're playing me out! Math was so much easier then expected and history was not as tough too (but I messed up on my study options so kick me) I guess being the first batch in the new syllabus makes it good for us after all :D I really want to do well.
Ow Ow ow, I bashed my head on the tap part of the shower and I got a nose bleed~ I hope nothing got broken or knocked out of place, I still need to take my exams the coming week and stuff you know...
Here is some delicious song, have it:
Olivia inspi' Reira (Trapnest) - WISH
Mabataki ga kaze wo yobu
Hohoemi ga zawameki wo keshisaru
Anata no me ni sumu tenshi ga sasayaku
Subete ga ima hajimaru to
> The twinkling of the stars calls to the wind
> Your smile erases the noise
> The angel in your eyes is whispering
> That everything is starting now
Can you feel it now
Can you feel it now
Nami ni nomi komareta you ni
Pulling on my heart
Pulling on my heart
Iki wo tome te wo nobashite
> Can you feel it now
> Can you feel it now
> Like being swallowed up by a wave
> Pulling on my heart
> Pulling on my heart
> I hold my breath and reach out your hand
Baby kono sekai wa
Kinou to wa chigau
Anata no koto shika mienai
Baby my wish on a wing
Kono sora wo saite
Afureru hitotsu no kotoba de
> Baby, this world is different
> From yesterday
> I can't see anyone but you
> Baby my wish on a wing
> Tears through the sky
> In one overwhelming word
Kagayaki wo tadoru shisen
Mayowazu anata e hashiru no ni
Tachi sukumu kokoro tameiki wo tsuku
Marude nagai tabi no you de
> My eyes follow the light
> Running without hesitation to you
> My petrified heart breathes a sigh
> It’s like a long journey
Can you feel it now
Can you feel it now
Toki wa mujou ni nagarete ku
Pulling on my heart
Pulling on my heart
Kono omoi toki hanashite
> Can you feel it now
> Can you feel it now
> The time goes by mercilessly
> Pulling on my heart
> Pulling on my heart
> I set my love free
Baby mou mirai mo
Yakusoku mo iranai
Anata ga soko ni iru dake de
Baby my wish on a wing
Kono koe wo tobase
Furueru hoshi wo tsukinukete
> Baby, I don't need a future
> Or promises
> As long as you're here
> Baby my wish on a wing
> Send out this voice
> And let it break through the flickering stars
Do you feel me?
Do your feel me now?
Baby kono sekai wa
Kinou to wa chigau
Anata no koto shika mienai
Baby my wish on a wing
Kono sora wo saite
Afureru hitotsu no kotoba de
> Baby, this world is different
> From yesterday
> I can't see anyone but you
> Baby my wish on a wing
> Tears through the sky
> In one overwhelming word
Baby mou mirai mo
Yakusoku mo iranai
Anata ga soko ni iru dake de
Baby my wish on a wing
Kono koe wo tobase
Furueru hoshi wo tsukinukete
> Baby, I don't need a future
> Or promises
> As long as you're here
> Baby my wish on a wing
> Send out this voice
> And let it break through the flickering stars
----------------------------------------------------------------
One more week's worth of all the important H2 papers to go but in my heart I feel as though the exams are all already over. The spirit is defined as all your body, heart mind and soul. Courage will turn 1% to 100%, believe and it will happen, sprung from the infinite depths of the human spirit. On heaven and on earth, as one body and one soul-CHOUGINGA GURREN LAGANN! LoL. Gurren Lagann always helps when I need a pick-upper. Epic series +1, emo-ish but lovely song 0.
I think I'll go join the rest of the Rangers for their trek on Saturday and go help out on Sunday morning :D I'm excited!
Ok I must sleep for the morning paper tomorrow.
Quote of e Post:
My Wish on a Wing
Lets backtrack (lets see... last post was 1st Nov) so yea, history paper 2 and math on 2nd Nov. Damn Cambridge, you're playing me out! Math was so much easier then expected and history was not as tough too (but I messed up on my study options so kick me) I guess being the first batch in the new syllabus makes it good for us after all :D I really want to do well.
Ow Ow ow, I bashed my head on the tap part of the shower and I got a nose bleed~ I hope nothing got broken or knocked out of place, I still need to take my exams the coming week and stuff you know...
Here is some delicious song, have it:
Olivia inspi' Reira (Trapnest) - WISH
Mabataki ga kaze wo yobu
Hohoemi ga zawameki wo keshisaru
Anata no me ni sumu tenshi ga sasayaku
Subete ga ima hajimaru to
> The twinkling of the stars calls to the wind
> Your smile erases the noise
> The angel in your eyes is whispering
> That everything is starting now
Can you feel it now
Can you feel it now
Nami ni nomi komareta you ni
Pulling on my heart
Pulling on my heart
Iki wo tome te wo nobashite
> Can you feel it now
> Can you feel it now
> Like being swallowed up by a wave
> Pulling on my heart
> Pulling on my heart
> I hold my breath and reach out your hand
Baby kono sekai wa
Kinou to wa chigau
Anata no koto shika mienai
Baby my wish on a wing
Kono sora wo saite
Afureru hitotsu no kotoba de
> Baby, this world is different
> From yesterday
> I can't see anyone but you
> Baby my wish on a wing
> Tears through the sky
> In one overwhelming word
Kagayaki wo tadoru shisen
Mayowazu anata e hashiru no ni
Tachi sukumu kokoro tameiki wo tsuku
Marude nagai tabi no you de
> My eyes follow the light
> Running without hesitation to you
> My petrified heart breathes a sigh
> It’s like a long journey
Can you feel it now
Can you feel it now
Toki wa mujou ni nagarete ku
Pulling on my heart
Pulling on my heart
Kono omoi toki hanashite
> Can you feel it now
> Can you feel it now
> The time goes by mercilessly
> Pulling on my heart
> Pulling on my heart
> I set my love free
Baby mou mirai mo
Yakusoku mo iranai
Anata ga soko ni iru dake de
Baby my wish on a wing
Kono koe wo tobase
Furueru hoshi wo tsukinukete
> Baby, I don't need a future
> Or promises
> As long as you're here
> Baby my wish on a wing
> Send out this voice
> And let it break through the flickering stars
Do you feel me?
Do your feel me now?
Baby kono sekai wa
Kinou to wa chigau
Anata no koto shika mienai
Baby my wish on a wing
Kono sora wo saite
Afureru hitotsu no kotoba de
> Baby, this world is different
> From yesterday
> I can't see anyone but you
> Baby my wish on a wing
> Tears through the sky
> In one overwhelming word
Baby mou mirai mo
Yakusoku mo iranai
Anata ga soko ni iru dake de
Baby my wish on a wing
Kono koe wo tobase
Furueru hoshi wo tsukinukete
> Baby, I don't need a future
> Or promises
> As long as you're here
> Baby my wish on a wing
> Send out this voice
> And let it break through the flickering stars
----------------------------------------------------------------
One more week's worth of all the important H2 papers to go but in my heart I feel as though the exams are all already over. The spirit is defined as all your body, heart mind and soul. Courage will turn 1% to 100%, believe and it will happen, sprung from the infinite depths of the human spirit. On heaven and on earth, as one body and one soul-
I think I'll go join the rest of the Rangers for their trek on Saturday and go help out on Sunday morning :D I'm excited!
Ok I must sleep for the morning paper tomorrow.
Quote of e Post:
My Wish on a Wing
Thursday, November 01, 2007
I need your love
ANNA inspi' NANA (BLACK STONES) - rose
When I was darkness at that time fueteru kuchibiru
Heya no katasumi de I cry
Mogakeba mogaku hodo tsukisasaru kono kizu
Yaburareta yakusoku hurt me
My lips were trembling
And I cried in the corner of the room
The more I struggle, the more this wound pierces
The broken promises hurt me
Nobody can save me
Kamisama hitotsu dake
Tomete saku you na my love
Nobody can save me
There is but one God
It seems like my love stops and tears me
I need your love!
I'm a broken rose
Maichiru kanashimi your song
Ibasho nai kodoku na my life
I need your love! I'm a broken rose.
Your song is the sadness that falls down
My lonely life with nowhere to go.
I need your love
I'm a broken rose.
Oh baby, help me from frozen pain
With your smile, your eyes, and sing me, just for me
I wanna need your love...
I'm a broken rose
I wanna need your love...
When you were with me at that time
Anata no kage wo oikakete
Hadashi de kakemekete stop me
Tozaseba tozasu hodo motsureteku kono ai
Yuruyaka ni yasashiku kiss me
When you were with me at that time,
I chased after your shadow,
And you couldn't stop me as I ran through it
The more I block it out, the more this love gets complicated
Kiss me gently, tenderly
Nobody can save me
Kogoeru bara no you ni
Yasashiku nemuritai my tears
Nobody can save me,
Like a frozen rose,
My tears want to sleep gently
I need your love.
I'm a broken rose.
Kareochiru kanashimi my soul
Kuzureochiru kodoku na little girl
I need your love! I'm a broken rose.
My sad soul dies off,
And I'm a little girl that breaks down.
I need your love.
I'm a broken rose.
Oh baby, help me from frozen pain
with your smile, your eyes,
And sing me, just for me
I wanna need your love…
I'm a broken rose
I wanna need your love…
Nobody can help me...
Nobody can help me...
I'm a broken rose...
I need your love
I'm a broken rose
Maichiru kanashimi your song
Ibasho nai kodoku na my life
I need your love! I'm a broken rose.
Your song is the sadness that falls down
My lonely life with nowhere to go.
I need your love
I'm a broken rose.
Oh baby, help me from frozen pain
With your smile, your eyes, and sing me, just for me
I wanna need your love…
I was a broken rose
I wanna need your love…
---------------------------------------------------
I had to post something but I decided to cut down on the weepy stuff (for now). Sure, all the songs will come out here sooner or later I think. Once again I picked a fan made video as the original MV was not to my liking (the singer looked like she was stoned on drugs or something). What genre would this go into? They're supposed to be a punk rock band but their CD irl is sold as j-rock (obviously).
Maths and History tomorrow! At least history is in the afternoon so I can make sure I remember everything for math today. Not-fun.
Quote of e Post:
help me from the frozen pain
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
I'm here waiting for you
OLIVIA inspi' REIRA (TRAPNEST) - A little pain
Travel to the moon
Kimi wa nemuri yume wo toku
Dare mo inai Hoshi no hikari ayatsurinagara
Travel to the moon
You're sleeping, solving a dream
while the light of the deserted star pulls the [puppet strings]
Tsuyoku naru tame Wasureta egao
kitto futari nara torimodosu
I forgot to smile in order to be strong
I'm sure that if we're together, I can get it back
*
Kidzuite
I'm here waiting for you
Ima to wa chigau mirai ga attemo
I'm here waiting for you
Sakebitsudzukete
Kitto kokoro wa Tsunagu ito wo tagutteru
Ano koro no watashi me wo samasu you ni
No need to cry
Realize that
I'm here waiting for you
Even if the future is different from now
I'm here waiting for you
continuing to shout
Surely my heart is reeling in the string that connects us
No need to cry
In order to wake me up that time
Travel in silence
Te wo nobaseba Fureru noni
Kimi wa tooi
Sore wa omoide no naka no koto
Travel in silence
When I stretch my hand out, I feel you, but
You're far away
It's within my memories
Koe ga kikoeru Me wo tojireba
Chiisana itami sae itoshikute
When I close my eyes, I can hear your voice
Even the small ache is dear to me
Mitsumete
I'm here waiting for you
Kaze ni fukare hitori mayottemo
I'm here waiting for you
Sora wo miagete
Zutto kokoro wa Te wo hirogete mamotteru
Ano koro no kimi ga furikaeru made
No need to cry
Look at me
I'm here waiting for you
Even if I'm lost all alone with the wind blowing on me
I'm here waiting for you
My heart is protecting you all the time, my hands spread out
No need to cry
Until your former self turns back
(Feel something Feel nothing Listen closely Listen closely)
Wide open ears
Disarm the dream tickler
In the constant moment
(You will find me Where it's quiet Listen closely Listen closely)
Let the blood flow
Through all the spaces
Of the universe
* repeat
----------------------------------------
Lovely song <3 Even if this show wasn't great, the music would have been enough for me to love it. I don't understand, what made me watch this anyway. This show contains no explosions, no robots, too true to life, introspective depressing themes and very sad pitiful characters. Oh yea, its because senpai introduced it to me. Ought I watch the movies? I heard its not as good as the animation though. Today's paper was fun. I really enjoyed myself. At this rate, I just might get into university.
*Edit* Even though I know its probably no big deal and nothing personal, why does that absence cause such a cavernous vacancy...
Quote of e Post: The suite room is reserved for only the first and the last times.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
A Little Pain
I was surfing around for some ideas on how to cram math in like one week (I know I know...) when I suddenly got inspiration/motivation etc- to watch NANA. Even though I knew from first look that the manga art really turned me off, perhaps the animation is better. And it was.
Deviation aside is... you know you're in trouble when the characters in an anime suddenly live more normal lives then you do. *_* U_U >_< !_! Hey... there aren't any good symbols to represent a proper crying face...
Even though I've only watched a few episodes, its more or less the most real to life series I've watched. Maybe I will go on the 24th after all. Just maybe.
Quote of e Post:
Travel to the moon, you sleep and your dreams unravel
Darling, I'm out here tending your precious light without you
Deviation aside is... you know you're in trouble when the characters in an anime suddenly live more normal lives then you do. *_* U_U >_< !_! Hey... there aren't any good symbols to represent a proper crying face...
Even though I've only watched a few episodes, its more or less the most real to life series I've watched. Maybe I will go on the 24th after all. Just maybe.
Quote of e Post:
Travel to the moon, you sleep and your dreams unravel
Darling, I'm out here tending your precious light without you
Monday, October 29, 2007
Minor Edit
For those of you who actually read this page. I'm sure you're as sick as I am of the many times there's no background when imgshack decides it needs to hangover so I spent some time fixing it up on my own. Didn't take too long (ought to have done it long ago).
Good Job. Damn, I need to study.
Good Job. Damn, I need to study.
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Masquerade x Destiny
Masquerade
Vocals: Hitomi
Lyrics: Kuroishi Hitomi
Composition: Kuroishi Hitomi
Kokoro ni kagi o kaketa mama
Tsumetai taido de kamen o mi ni tsukeru
Dare ga boku no sugao
Shitte iru darou? Kimi no hoka ni wa
> While my heart is still locked
> With a cold attitude, I don a mask on my body
> Who knows
> My true face? Besides you
Jibun no yowasa mo tsuyosa mo
Sarakedashitai nante ichido mo omowazu ni
Namida kakushite kita
Hontou no kao o miserareru hito
> Without ever giving a thought about exposing
> My own weaknesses and strengths
> I hid my tears
> From people who could show their true faces
Sagashitsuzuketeta kimi o ushinaenai
> I can't lose you, who I kept searching for
You’re My Destiny
Shinjite mitai
Eien no imi wa mada wakaranai kedo
You’re My Destiny
Ashita no yume o
Tsuzureba sore ga unmei ni kawaru
Say you’ll share with me one love
You’re My Destiny
> I want to try and believe
> I still don’t understand the meaning of eternity
> But You’re My Destiny
> If I compose tomorrow’s dream
> Then it’ll become my destiny
> Say you’ll share with me one love
Kono te ni tsukamitoru tame ni
Heiki de kizutsukete koko made ikite kita
Dakedo kodoku dake ga
Kono boku no te ni nokosareta mono
> In order to grasp it into my hands
> I calmly hurt others and lived to this point
> But loneliness
> Was the only thing left in the hands of this me
Nani mo nozomanai kimi ga soba ni ireba
> I won’t desire anything if you’re by my side
You’re My Destiny
Kokoro o akete
Uchiaketai yuzurenai omoi o
You’re My Destiny
Kanjiru kizuna
Futari no deai unmei nanda to
Say you’ll share with me one love
> You’re My Destiny
> Open your heart
> I want to confess my unyielding thoughts
> You’re My Destiny
> The bond that I feel
> Is the destiny of our meeting
> Say you’ll share with me one love
You’re My Destiny
Shinjite mitai…
You’re My Destiny
Ashita no yume o…
> You’re My Destiny
> I want to try and believe…
> You’re My Destiny
> In tomorrow’s dream…
You’re My Destiny
Kokoro o akete
Uchiaketai yuzurenai omoi o
You’re My Destiny
Kanjiru kizuna
Futari no deai unmei nanda to
Say you’ll share with me one love
> You’re My Destiny
> Open your heart
> I want to confess my unyielding thoughts
> You’re My Destiny
> The bond that I feel
> Is the destiny of our meeting
> Say you’ll share with me one love
-----------------------------------------------------
Code Geass and Death Note are awesome because of their main characters who are smart, cool, calculated and manage to toggle their double lives well enough to rise to positions or great power and influence. Who cares if they got found out or died in the end. The process is admirable. They went out with a bang, and made a mark on the world. If blood has to flow for dreams to realize, then let it flow. One cannot progress being altruistic. Justice is dead, it never lived.
Feelings are such unreliable things. It produces no tangible results, rising and fading without reason. Just a chemical reaction in the mind and an appropriate physical reaction as a result from signals from your brain. You can fool it with drugs, you can emulate it with a computer, feelings aren't anything special or exclusive. Even plants and animals have them. They can be buried with conditioning and ignored with practice. Yet, still hardly anyone chooses to throw them away. I know this, but I can't either.
Crap, I forgot what I was going to write about. And I was so passionate about it just a few hours ago too. Oh wells. 4 more days to A-levels, wonderful, its makes my hands itch.
Quote of e Post:
-dont touch me-
Friday, October 26, 2007
Bitter Virgin
Its not all not not about me. I've just been reading.
People use love to project their dreams on others. Because all they've fallen in love with is an idea. The only thing one can truly love is that which they have themselves created to be perfect in their eyes.
To be in love is supposed to be the happiest time in one's life. But its existence is premonition of a vacuum that will be left. When one day that initial loving attraction dies all that's left will be disappointment and acceptance.
Don't you see, love creates an incredible amount of happiness; but because of that people are blinded by love.
People use love to project their dreams on others. Its such a farce, don't you think? Love isn't supposed to be selfish but it is. Love is respecting who the other person is, but this isn't it at all.
Have you ever loved someone whole-heartedly? How are we supposed to understand things like that.
Do you understand what it takes for someone to put together their feelings? || If we cant reply to that person's feelings why should we bother accepting it in the first place. || Its not going to lead anywhere. || Its only your opinion that it isn't leading anywhere || Why do you keep silent in a situation like this? Why wont you confess? So what if she's engaged, steal her away from him!
You can easily say that because you're commenting on other people's situation.
That kind of love will never work out.
We cant meet anymore.
Running away has never solved anything. But its easier then figuring out what to do.
Is that what is... how terrible! Are you serious? You're old enough to know better! What is this? Thats the worst kind of -. Thats disgusting.
The feeling is self evident.
What was it that i was looking forward to?
How long will I feel so incomplete, putting on a miserable face and taking those near to me for granted?
I shouldn't read seinen so much. Shounen stuff is far less complicating.
Quote of e Post:
True love does not come by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.
People use love to project their dreams on others. Because all they've fallen in love with is an idea. The only thing one can truly love is that which they have themselves created to be perfect in their eyes.
To be in love is supposed to be the happiest time in one's life. But its existence is premonition of a vacuum that will be left. When one day that initial loving attraction dies all that's left will be disappointment and acceptance.
Don't you see, love creates an incredible amount of happiness; but because of that people are blinded by love.
People use love to project their dreams on others. Its such a farce, don't you think? Love isn't supposed to be selfish but it is. Love is respecting who the other person is, but this isn't it at all.
Have you ever loved someone whole-heartedly? How are we supposed to understand things like that.
Do you understand what it takes for someone to put together their feelings? || If we cant reply to that person's feelings why should we bother accepting it in the first place. || Its not going to lead anywhere. || Its only your opinion that it isn't leading anywhere || Why do you keep silent in a situation like this? Why wont you confess? So what if she's engaged, steal her away from him!
You can easily say that because you're commenting on other people's situation.
That kind of love will never work out.
Running away has never solved anything. But its easier then figuring out what to do.
Is that what is... how terrible! Are you serious? You're old enough to know better! What is this? Thats the worst kind of -. Thats disgusting.
The feeling is self evident.
What was it that i was looking forward to?
How long will I feel so incomplete, putting on a miserable face and taking those near to me for granted?
I shouldn't read seinen so much. Shounen stuff is far less complicating.
Quote of e Post:
True love does not come by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Im such a /b/tard
Its ironic, when life and the people you know are going totally crazy, one can find sanity in the refuge of one of the most insane cesspools of the internet. Once an anonymous, always an anonymous.
I see what you did there.
Once you see it, you'll shat bricks. Pic related.
Quote of the Post:
man i remember in like second grade the teaxcher asked what 2-3 was
and someone was like "you can't do that"
and she was all "right you can't
and i was like "nooo, NEGATIVE NUMBERS"
and she ignored me
bitch
I see what you did there.
Once you see it, you'll shat bricks. Pic related.
Quote of the Post:
Monday, October 22, 2007
These Mysteries
Mug Mug Mug. Huh? No its not my ceramic cup collection nor is it a violent act of robbery, its colloquial for studying.
Its been days, weeks, months, years since I started this blog. And every single post (well almost) hasn't been quite serious enough. (even the serious ones are mixed in with madness) Not that its a bad thing really. I'm not the serious kind of person until I'm dead serious. Then nothings funny~ but where's the fun in that?
Time flies when you're "having fun"
I'm just trying to be happy here alright, but life just never lets things go that way. Yea I really don't know any of you, do I?
Just go then. Dump the legacy. Live you drama filled life. Be as volatile as you like, its only your time and your life. Its not like I needed to know any more then those who were "important to you". Maybe I don't need to know you after all~
Quote of e Post:
And I'm on fire
Burning at these mysteries
Its been days, weeks, months, years since I started this blog. And every single post (well almost) hasn't been quite serious enough. (even the serious ones are mixed in with madness) Not that its a bad thing really. I'm not the serious kind of person until I'm dead serious. Then nothings funny~ but where's the fun in that?
Time flies when you're "having fun"
I'm just trying to be happy here alright, but life just never lets things go that way. Yea I really don't know any of you, do I?
Just go then. Dump the legacy. Live you drama filled life. Be as volatile as you like, its only your time and your life. Its not like I needed to know any more then those who were "important to you". Maybe I don't need to know you after all~
Quote of e Post:
And I'm on fire
Burning at these mysteries
Saturday, October 20, 2007
What Is Gar?
I guess the constant rains have been keeping everybody down. But its alright now, I know it :)
Happy Birthday Fides! (one day late) Though I don't think you know my blog haha :P
Going for the sexuality talk by Ps Peter Chng soon-da. Will blog more when I return-da. xD
/r/equesting all opinions on the Motorola W220, in return I give you delicious cake... in bed xD
LoL. Cram math is cram. See the snorlax? I wuv mai snorlax xD Oh gosh~ I'm getting high on nothing haha. Raw Raw Fight the power. Finally I'll explain haha.
Rap is a Devil of a Man! Perk Up Your Earholes and Listen REAL Close to the Theme of Lord Kamina, the Man of Raging Billows Who Believes in Himself and Points to Heaven!!
-Hook
Do the impossible
See the invisible
Raw! Raw!
Fight the power!
Touch the untouchable
Break the unbreakable
Raw! Raw!
Fight the power!
What you gonna do is what you wanna do
Just break the rules, then you see the truth
This is the theme of "G" coming through baby!
Raw! Raw!
Fight the power!
-Verse1
Power to the peeps, power for the dream
Still missing piece scattering, so incomplete
We be the most incredible soldier from underground
See how easy, they all fall down
Digging to the core to see the light
Let's get out of here babe, that's the way to survive
Top of the head, I'm on the set
Do the impossible, don't you wanna bet?
Cuz, a lot of things changed, we be waiting in vain
If you wanna get by, no pain no gain
Wow! fakers wanna test me again
Sorry, my rhyme's gonna snatch your brain
We gonna make it happen with the crazy rap
We gonna make it happen with the crazy rap skill
Get ready to rumble, now is the time
If you don't know, now you know
(Good luck fellows! Ha Ha)
-Hook
-Verse2
2nd verse dedicates to the real peeps
What we got to say is so real thing
Cuz, revolution ain't never gonna televise
Kicking the mad flow, microphone phenotype
Open your third eye, seeing through the overground
I'm about to hit you with the scream from the underground
Whole city is covered with the cyber flavor
"G" is in your area, one of the toughest enigma
-Hook
----------------------------------------------------------
Yea that whole long thing on top is the title xD And "G" obviously stands for GAR, not gay >.> For those who don't know what GAR is, for once wiki fails. GAR is totally not an alligator thing~
GAR, also spelt Gar or gar, is a term used to describe a character that is the epitome of what it means to be manly and badass. Derived from the Roman concept glorifying men who strive for a life of courage, self-sacrifice, overcoming the impossible and honoring those who die a worthy death. + Individuals of this standard are as rare as they are awesome, emotionally overwhelming those watching to the point of orgasming in surprise and excitement or sobbing uncontrollably in a flush of admiration.
Okay, the last part may be a little exaggerated (me, me, me!) but now we all know. LETS SPREAD THE GAR-NESS! We just wanna be big Gar-stars xD
Quote of e Post:
In the key of F-da
Happy Birthday Fides! (one day late) Though I don't think you know my blog haha :P
Going for the sexuality talk by Ps Peter Chng soon-da. Will blog more when I return-da. xD
/r/equesting all opinions on the Motorola W220, in return I give you delicious cake... in bed xD
LoL. Cram math is cram. See the snorlax? I wuv mai snorlax xD Oh gosh~ I'm getting high on nothing haha. Raw Raw Fight the power. Finally I'll explain haha.Rap is a Devil of a Man! Perk Up Your Earholes and Listen REAL Close to the Theme of Lord Kamina, the Man of Raging Billows Who Believes in Himself and Points to Heaven!!
-Hook
Do the impossible
See the invisible
Raw! Raw!
Fight the power!
Touch the untouchable
Break the unbreakable
Raw! Raw!
Fight the power!
What you gonna do is what you wanna do
Just break the rules, then you see the truth
This is the theme of "G" coming through baby!
Raw! Raw!
Fight the power!
-Verse1
Power to the peeps, power for the dream
Still missing piece scattering, so incomplete
We be the most incredible soldier from underground
See how easy, they all fall down
Digging to the core to see the light
Let's get out of here babe, that's the way to survive
Top of the head, I'm on the set
Do the impossible, don't you wanna bet?
Cuz, a lot of things changed, we be waiting in vain
If you wanna get by, no pain no gain
Wow! fakers wanna test me again
Sorry, my rhyme's gonna snatch your brain
We gonna make it happen with the crazy rap
We gonna make it happen with the crazy rap skill
Get ready to rumble, now is the time
If you don't know, now you know
(Good luck fellows! Ha Ha)
-Hook
-Verse2
2nd verse dedicates to the real peeps
What we got to say is so real thing
Cuz, revolution ain't never gonna televise
Kicking the mad flow, microphone phenotype
Open your third eye, seeing through the overground
I'm about to hit you with the scream from the underground
Whole city is covered with the cyber flavor
"G" is in your area, one of the toughest enigma
-Hook
----------------------------------------------------------
Yea that whole long thing on top is the title xD And "G" obviously stands for GAR, not gay >.> For those who don't know what GAR is, for once wiki fails. GAR is totally not an alligator thing~
GAR, also spelt Gar or gar, is a term used to describe a character that is the epitome of what it means to be manly and badass. Derived from the Roman concept glorifying men who strive for a life of courage, self-sacrifice, overcoming the impossible and honoring those who die a worthy death. + Individuals of this standard are as rare as they are awesome, emotionally overwhelming those watching to the point of orgasming in surprise and excitement or sobbing uncontrollably in a flush of admiration.
Okay, the last part may be a little exaggerated (me, me, me!) but now we all know. LETS SPREAD THE GAR-NESS! We just wanna be big Gar-stars xD
Quote of e Post:
In the key of F-da
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Raw Raw Fight the Powaa
I've been trying to put up a new post for the past two days but every-single-night I open up this window it stay empty for hours. Haha.
I'm hyped, but then- why is everyone so down? Lets see *flips through blogs* angsty, emo, depressed, emo, more emo- this blog has been closed down.. dang... *closes windows* Yea, I hope it does not get on me, but you know what I think? I'M TOO "BURNING" TO BE DOWN NOW! WHO DO YOU THINK I AM!?
[LOL it happened again, this page has been at this state for at least 4 hours lol]
Pfft~ so much for cheering other people up. Oh well. Raw Raw Fight the Powaa.
I can't stand it anymore. Witness the birth of GAR.
Brother is dead, he isn't here any longer
however, on my back, and within my heart, he continues to live on
Digging a hole to pierce the heavens!
Even if that hole becomes my grave
As long as I break through, its my victory!
Who the hell do you think I am?
I'm Simon
Not my bro, Kamina
I am myself! Simon the Digger!!
------------------------------------------
Fukken Epic Win. I can so relate. It's been hard finding a way to say this but~ This is my speech, this- is- my- victory~!! Thanks Edina.
The Other Me is DEAD! He isn't here any longer!
However, on my back and in my heart I'll continue to live on!
Digging a hole to pierce the heavens!
Even if that hole becomes my grave
As long as I break through, it is my victory!
WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?
I AM CHANG XIANG!
Not my persona, Faust
I AM MYSELF! LOH CHANG XIANG THE HUMAN!
Fight! Persevere! Face Reality! No matter how bleak life looks! For those taking exams, Its not over till its over! For those who think they're lives are screwed up- There will always be a way as long as you keep walking! For those who think they're not good enough~ BELIEVE! BELIEVE IN YOURSELF! NOT YOU, WHO BELIEVES IN ME. NOT ME, WHO BELIEVES IN YOU. BUT YOU! WHO BELIEVES IN YOURSELF!!
LETS GO PEOPLE! WHEN WE'RE ALL TOGETHER, THERE'S NOTHING TO BE AFRAID OF! TARGET SET~ LETS GO! TOWARDS THE FINAL BATTLE!
POWAAAAAA!!
Quote of e Post:
Do I still really need to put anything else down here? xD
I'm hyped, but then- why is everyone so down? Lets see *flips through blogs* angsty, emo, depressed, emo, more emo- this blog has been closed down.. dang... *closes windows* Yea, I hope it does not get on me, but you know what I think? I'M TOO "BURNING" TO BE DOWN NOW! WHO DO YOU THINK I AM!?
[LOL it happened again, this page has been at this state for at least 4 hours lol]
Pfft~ so much for cheering other people up. Oh well. Raw Raw Fight the Powaa.
I can't stand it anymore. Witness the birth of GAR.
Brother is dead, he isn't here any longer
however, on my back, and within my heart, he continues to live on
Digging a hole to pierce the heavens!
Even if that hole becomes my grave
As long as I break through, its my victory!
Who the hell do you think I am?
I'm Simon
Not my bro, Kamina
I am myself! Simon the Digger!!
------------------------------------------
The Other Me is DEAD! He isn't here any longer!
However, on my back and in my heart I'll continue to live on!
Digging a hole to pierce the heavens!
Even if that hole becomes my grave
As long as I break through, it is my victory!
WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM?
I AM CHANG XIANG!
Not my persona, Faust
I AM MYSELF! LOH CHANG XIANG THE HUMAN!
Fight! Persevere! Face Reality! No matter how bleak life looks! For those taking exams, Its not over till its over! For those who think they're lives are screwed up- There will always be a way as long as you keep walking! For those who think they're not good enough~ BELIEVE! BELIEVE IN YOURSELF! NOT YOU, WHO BELIEVES IN ME. NOT ME, WHO BELIEVES IN YOU. BUT YOU! WHO BELIEVES IN YOURSELF!!
LETS GO PEOPLE! WHEN WE'RE ALL TOGETHER, THERE'S NOTHING TO BE AFRAID OF! TARGET SET~ LETS GO! TOWARDS THE FINAL BATTLE!
POWAAAAAA!!
Quote of e Post:
Do I still really need to put anything else down here? xD
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Birthday
Its shaky but you can't tell like this haha. I love my cell <3
Dinner with the ERs, mmmm crabs :D (lol why matthew so sian)
Tsk, the Chef was in on the secret too! haha.
Shared cake :3 Delish mango cake.
Haha, just came back from dinner with my fellow ERs, gosh I LOVE them haha. Its hard not to really. Kinda happy now heehee. HAPPY BIRTHDAY CONRAD! And my mom got me a new wallet but its one of those kind of canvas like with Velcro? But its alright, I guess it's the thought that counts (looks longingly at an imaginary DS)
I lost my keys while I was out today :( bad way to end my day. Equivalent trade, always works.
So I have my license in hand, but what for?
I'll miss school.
Quote of e Post:
I can lay my saber down today
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
How Far We've Come
As Graduation approaches and many other things are ending at the same time I figured it would be a good time to share a new song, and it really is new this time round. Enjoy.
Matchbox Twenty - How Far We've Come
Waking up at the start of the end of the world,
But its feeling just like every morning before,
Now I wonder what my life is going to mean if its gone,
The cars are moving like a half a mile an hour if that
I started staring at the passengers waving goodbye
Can you tell me what was ever really special about me all this time
[chorus]
But I believe the world is burning to the ground
Oh well I guess we're gonna find out
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
Well I, believe, its all, coming to an end
Oh well, I guess, we're gonna pretend,
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
I think its turning to a crock but I don't really know
I can't remember caring for an hour or so
started crying and I couldn't stop myself
I started running but theres no where to run to
I sat down on the street and took a look at myself
Said where you going man you know the world is heading for hell
Say your goodbyes if you've got someone you can say goodbye to
[chorus]
I believe the world is burning to the ground
Oh well I guess we're gonna find out
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
Well I, believe, it all, is coming to an end
Oh well, I guess, we're gonna pretend,
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
Its gone gone baby its all gone
There is no one on the corner and there's no one at home
It was cool cool, it was just all cool
Now it's over for me and it's over for you
Well its gone gone baby its all gone
There is no one on the corner and there's no one at home
Well it was cool cool, it was just all cool
Now it's over for me and it's over for you
[chorus]
I believe the world is burning to the ground
Oh well I guess we're gonna find out
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
Well I, believe, it all, is coming to an end
Oh well, I guess, we're gonna pretend,
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
... to end
---------------------------
So at the end of Army, at the end of JC, at the end of life as we have comfortable known it. How far have we come?
Quote of e Post:
Hey, haven’t you seen another shape besides this one? That’s so sad
To you, there’s no desire to die or to kill, oh, please
Matchbox Twenty - How Far We've Come
Waking up at the start of the end of the world,
But its feeling just like every morning before,
Now I wonder what my life is going to mean if its gone,
The cars are moving like a half a mile an hour if that
I started staring at the passengers waving goodbye
Can you tell me what was ever really special about me all this time
[chorus]
But I believe the world is burning to the ground
Oh well I guess we're gonna find out
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
Well I, believe, its all, coming to an end
Oh well, I guess, we're gonna pretend,
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
I think its turning to a crock but I don't really know
I can't remember caring for an hour or so
started crying and I couldn't stop myself
I started running but theres no where to run to
I sat down on the street and took a look at myself
Said where you going man you know the world is heading for hell
Say your goodbyes if you've got someone you can say goodbye to
[chorus]
I believe the world is burning to the ground
Oh well I guess we're gonna find out
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
Well I, believe, it all, is coming to an end
Oh well, I guess, we're gonna pretend,
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
Its gone gone baby its all gone
There is no one on the corner and there's no one at home
It was cool cool, it was just all cool
Now it's over for me and it's over for you
Well its gone gone baby its all gone
There is no one on the corner and there's no one at home
Well it was cool cool, it was just all cool
Now it's over for me and it's over for you
[chorus]
I believe the world is burning to the ground
Oh well I guess we're gonna find out
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
Well I, believe, it all, is coming to an end
Oh well, I guess, we're gonna pretend,
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
Let's see how far we've come
... to end
---------------------------
So at the end of Army, at the end of JC, at the end of life as we have comfortable known it. How far have we come?
Quote of e Post:
Hey, haven’t you seen another shape besides this one? That’s so sad
To you, there’s no desire to die or to kill, oh, please
Tuesday, October 09, 2007
Life Soundtrack
Taken from Elhannah =) One more place for you to search your name out! Haha.
If Your life was a movie, what would the soundtrack be?
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your music library (iTunes, Winamp and WMP... ill just do all haha)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing(don't cheat!)
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
Waking Up:
Lord of the Speed [Rider Chips]
Koi no Tenshi Mai Orite [Love Hina]
Omokage (Reminiscent) [Hayashibara Megumi]
First Day At School:
Li Xiang Qing Ren [Rainie Yang Cheng Ning]
Pride [High and Mighty Color]
I am [Hitomi]
Falling in Love:
We Are [Do as Infinity]
Zhong Guo Hua [SHE]
Yue Ding [Guang Liang]
Fight Song:
Final Fantasy VIII theme: Eyes on You
Chain [BACK-ON]
Made Me Glad [Hillsongs]
Breaking Up:
Trust [Okui Masami]
Colors [FLOW]
Freedom [Toshihiki Seki]
Prom:
Follow [Michael Battersby]
Now That You're Near [Hillsongs]
Kanashimi wo Yasashisa Ni [Little by Little]
Life:
Chuang Wai [Jacky Wu]
One Star [Yousuke Itou]
The Nicest Kids in Town [Hairspray Soundtrack]
Mental Breakdown:
The Star Spangled Banner (HAHA! Oh yea, America will drive me mad)
Levan Polkka [Louituma]
Fly [Hillary Duff]
Driving:
Out of my Head [Fastball]
The Fourth Ave Cafe [L'Arc~en~Ciel]
Double Action [Takeru Satoh]
Flashback:
Inori~You Raise me Up [Lena Park]
Still Time [Hidenori Tokuyama]
Your Name [Paul Baloche]
Getting Back Together:
Which to Bury, Us or the Hatchet [Relient K] (So fitting haha)
In too deep [Sum 41]
LIFE [Yui]
Wedding:
Never Again [Kelly Clarkson] (Ohh kay...)
Fire!! [Kouji Wada]
True Colors [Cyndi Lauper]
Birth of a Child:
Trust You Forever [Ushima Hitofumi]
Here I am [Planet Shakers]
Fen Shou Kuai Le [Liang Jing Ru]
Final Battle:
Guess I'm Doing Fine [Beck]
Rocks [Hound Dog]
All Alone [Tamaki Nami]
Death Scene:
Hikari (Light) [Utada Hikaru]
Yozora no Mukou (Beyond the Night Sky) [SMAP]
Taiyou (Sun) [Bite the Lung]
Funeral Scene:
Someday [Nickelback]
Anata to Ireba (If I'm with you) [Tange Sakura, Iwao Junko]
Spicy Love [Mejare Pirates]
End Credits:
Addicted to You [Utada Hikaru]
One Winged Angel [FF VII]
Free Will [Ruppina]
Without any surprises, Winamp gives me the most logical results once again. I really love some of those :) Windows Media Player gave the worst results but despite which player I used, they ALL gave satisfactory answers for the question on what would give me a mental breakdown! Haha.
I remember doing one of these before and the answers were freaking eerily accurate. Winamp of course :)
Well, you can copy and do it on your blog. How will your soundtrack turn out?
If Your life was a movie, what would the soundtrack be?
So, here's how it works:
1. Open your music library (iTunes, Winamp and WMP... ill just do all haha)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing(don't cheat!)
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
Waking Up:
Lord of the Speed [Rider Chips]
Koi no Tenshi Mai Orite [Love Hina]
Omokage (Reminiscent) [Hayashibara Megumi]
First Day At School:
Li Xiang Qing Ren [Rainie Yang Cheng Ning]
Pride [High and Mighty Color]
I am [Hitomi]
Falling in Love:
We Are [Do as Infinity]
Zhong Guo Hua [SHE]
Yue Ding [Guang Liang]
Fight Song:
Final Fantasy VIII theme: Eyes on You
Chain [BACK-ON]
Made Me Glad [Hillsongs]
Breaking Up:
Trust [Okui Masami]
Colors [FLOW]
Freedom [Toshihiki Seki]
Prom:
Follow [Michael Battersby]
Now That You're Near [Hillsongs]
Kanashimi wo Yasashisa Ni [Little by Little]
Life:
Chuang Wai [Jacky Wu]
One Star [Yousuke Itou]
The Nicest Kids in Town [Hairspray Soundtrack]
Mental Breakdown:
The Star Spangled Banner (HAHA! Oh yea, America will drive me mad)
Levan Polkka [Louituma]
Fly [Hillary Duff]
Driving:
Out of my Head [Fastball]
The Fourth Ave Cafe [L'Arc~en~Ciel]
Double Action [Takeru Satoh]
Flashback:
Inori~You Raise me Up [Lena Park]
Still Time [Hidenori Tokuyama]
Your Name [Paul Baloche]
Getting Back Together:
Which to Bury, Us or the Hatchet [Relient K] (So fitting haha)
In too deep [Sum 41]
LIFE [Yui]
Wedding:
Never Again [Kelly Clarkson] (Ohh kay...)
Fire!! [Kouji Wada]
True Colors [Cyndi Lauper]
Birth of a Child:
Trust You Forever [Ushima Hitofumi]
Here I am [Planet Shakers]
Fen Shou Kuai Le [Liang Jing Ru]
Final Battle:
Guess I'm Doing Fine [Beck]
Rocks [Hound Dog]
All Alone [Tamaki Nami]
Death Scene:
Hikari (Light) [Utada Hikaru]
Yozora no Mukou (Beyond the Night Sky) [SMAP]
Taiyou (Sun) [Bite the Lung]
Funeral Scene:
Someday [Nickelback]
Anata to Ireba (If I'm with you) [Tange Sakura, Iwao Junko]
Spicy Love [Mejare Pirates]
End Credits:
Addicted to You [Utada Hikaru]
One Winged Angel [FF VII]
Free Will [Ruppina]
Without any surprises, Winamp gives me the most logical results once again. I really love some of those :) Windows Media Player gave the worst results but despite which player I used, they ALL gave satisfactory answers for the question on what would give me a mental breakdown! Haha.
I remember doing one of these before and the answers were freaking eerily accurate. Winamp of course :)
Well, you can copy and do it on your blog. How will your soundtrack turn out?
Saturday, October 06, 2007
Southern Cross
Damn irritated now. My parents are mental. And I'm hungry. And tired.
My father first thought it was some genius idea to drag us out in the morning for a health test thing that tells you your body age, body fat and blah blah. That took like the entire morning and after eating lunch at about 12pm they dropped me and my sis home at about 3.30pm. That when it all went downhill and my mom went to Ikea to go look for furniture, until what? 10pm!! And here we were, starving and put off food by the stupid test in the morning (I don't need some mo+fu machine to tell me I'm unhealthy you jackass). When they came back guess what? Each thought the other had bought food so my sis ended up eating instant noodles (healthy eating my ass)
Me? Disgruntled as I already was, I have totally no mood for eating, much less eat some MSG laden vile tasting noodles. Oh and to add injury to insult, she bought NOTHING from Ikea. She just wanted to look around. WTF.
Another reason I'm irritated, I got my letter for NS right? So I'm going in on the 6th. I end As on the 23rd and I have prom on say the 27th. Thus my mom is pissed cos nowwe she can't go on "that wonderful holiday in Europe before army". She even wanted to put something on the week BEFORE As because theres no time. And she keeps bugging my asking where do I want to go for a holiday. Like wth is wrong with your brain? I don't HAVE TO and at this juncture I DON'T WANT TO. Maybe not being at home would be a GOOD THING~ I really don't think I'll miss my family when I'm gone. Think of it as an extended training camp. Yea, which pays you. Not bad imo.
I WANNA KICK SOME ASS AND EAT SOME UNHEALTHY BUT DELICIOUS FOOD!! BOO
<3 Southern Cross 403
Quote of e Post:
The Southern cross is twinkling and watching us.
Far beyond, so far away from us.
My father first thought it was some genius idea to drag us out in the morning for a health test thing that tells you your body age, body fat and blah blah. That took like the entire morning and after eating lunch at about 12pm they dropped me and my sis home at about 3.30pm. That when it all went downhill and my mom went to Ikea to go look for furniture, until what? 10pm!! And here we were, starving and put off food by the stupid test in the morning (I don't need some mo+fu machine to tell me I'm unhealthy you jackass). When they came back guess what? Each thought the other had bought food so my sis ended up eating instant noodles (healthy eating my ass)
Me? Disgruntled as I already was, I have totally no mood for eating, much less eat some MSG laden vile tasting noodles. Oh and to add injury to insult, she bought NOTHING from Ikea. She just wanted to look around. WTF.
Another reason I'm irritated, I got my letter for NS right? So I'm going in on the 6th. I end As on the 23rd and I have prom on say the 27th. Thus my mom is pissed cos now
I WANNA KICK SOME ASS AND EAT SOME UNHEALTHY BUT DELICIOUS FOOD!! BOO
<3 Southern Cross 403
Quote of e Post:
The Southern cross is twinkling and watching us.
Far beyond, so far away from us.
Fight the Break of Dawn
I got my NS enlistment letter today (for those who still don't know) and I'm slated to go in on the 6th of December. So come the 6th I'll no longer be a free man. Its pretty hard to grasp such a concept, that for two years, everything you do will be dictated and observed. You'll lose your individuality and your right to exercise free speech and will. You will no longer be able to live a normal life without the constant knowledge and reality of training nagging at the back of your mind, ingrained through rigorous repetition. And you will be bound by those shackles of duty for at best 10 years, at worse, till the age of 40.
Time is a terrible teacher. And an even worse doctor.I got over you.
Eagle-Eye Cherry - [Save Tonight]
Go on and close the curtains
All we need is candlelight
You and me and a bottle of wine
Going to hold you tonight
We know I'm going away
How I wish...wish it weren't so
Take this wine & drink with me
Let's delay our misery
Save tonight
And fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
Tomorrow I'll be gone
There's a log on the fire
And it burns like me for you
Tomorrow comes with one desire
To take me away...it's true
It ain't easy to say goodbye
Darling please don't start cry
'Cause girl you know I've got to go
Lord I wish it wasn't so
Save tonight
And fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
Tomorrow I'll be gone
Tomorrow comes to take me away
I wish that I...that I could stay
Girl you know I've got to go
Lord I wish it wasn't so
Save tonight
And fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
Tomorrow I'll be gone...
------------------------------------------
"Tomorrow" I'll be gone. And the person whom you once knew, who loved you futilely will no longer be.
Rebirth through self-destruction. Maybe Plath, mad as she may have been in her final hours, might have gleaned an insight sanity has denied us all. Fides Spes Caritas.
Quote of e Post:
Tomorrow comes to take me away
I wish that I... that I could stay
Time is a terrible teacher. And an even worse doctor.
Eagle-Eye Cherry - [Save Tonight]
Go on and close the curtains
All we need is candlelight
You and me and a bottle of wine
Going to hold you tonight
We know I'm going away
How I wish...wish it weren't so
Take this wine & drink with me
Let's delay our misery
Save tonight
And fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
Tomorrow I'll be gone
There's a log on the fire
And it burns like me for you
Tomorrow comes with one desire
To take me away...it's true
It ain't easy to say goodbye
Darling please don't start cry
'Cause girl you know I've got to go
Lord I wish it wasn't so
Save tonight
And fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
Tomorrow I'll be gone
Tomorrow comes to take me away
I wish that I...that I could stay
Girl you know I've got to go
Lord I wish it wasn't so
Save tonight
And fight the break of dawn
Come tomorrow
Tomorrow I'll be gone...
------------------------------------------
"Tomorrow" I'll be gone. And the person whom you once knew, who loved you futilely will no longer be.
Rebirth through self-destruction. Maybe Plath, mad as she may have been in her final hours, might have gleaned an insight sanity has denied us all. Fides Spes Caritas.
Quote of e Post:
Tomorrow comes to take me away
I wish that I... that I could stay
Thursday, October 04, 2007
Over You
Last six days of school. I'm going to miss being a student for those two years in the military.
Kind of pointless going for consultation ifyou didn't study at all the teacher does not know how to help you. I guess its about time to get down to actually doing something. 25 days.
Lovely song. I didn't want to put the actual MV cos I didn't really like the content on it. So here's the song WITHOUT the video. Yea, you can stare at his face for 3min+
Chris Daughtry - Over You
Now that it`s all said and done
I can`t believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down
Like an old abandoned house
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath
I felt as if I was in way to deep
Guess I let you get the best of me
[Chorus]
Well I never saw it coming
I should have started running
A long, long time ago
And I never thought I`d doubt you
I`m better off without you
More than you, more than you know
I`m slowly getting closure
I guess it`s really over
I`m finally getting better
Now I`m picking up the pieces
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
Cause the day I thought I`d never get through
I got over you
You took a hammer to these walls
Dragged the memories down the hall
Packed your bags and walked away
There was nothing I could say,
And when you slammed the front door shut
A lot of others opened up
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me
[Chorus]
I never saw it coming
I should have started running
A long, long time ago
And I never thought I`d doubt you
I`m better off without you
And I never saw it coming
I should have started running
I`m finally getting better
Now I`m picking up the pieces
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
And I got over you
And I got over you
And I got over you
The day I thought I`d never get through
I got over you
--------------------------------------------------
See the happy moron,
He doesn't give a damn.
I wish I were a moron,
Oh God, perhaps I am.
Its been (somewhat) a fun two years, and even though graduation isn't even here yet. And there's still prom and A levels itself, my jc journey seems just about over. There were pockets of regret and rejoicing here and there. Drama, action and effort aplenty. For one year and ten months~
Nevar Forget
Quote of e Post:
I`m slowly getting closure
I guess it`s really over
I`m finally getting better
Kind of pointless going for consultation if
Lovely song. I didn't want to put the actual MV cos I didn't really like the content on it. So here's the song WITHOUT the video. Yea, you can stare at his face for 3min+
Chris Daughtry - Over You
Now that it`s all said and done
I can`t believe you were the one
To build me up and tear me down
Like an old abandoned house
What you said when you left
Just left me cold and out of breath
I felt as if I was in way to deep
Guess I let you get the best of me
[Chorus]
Well I never saw it coming
I should have started running
A long, long time ago
And I never thought I`d doubt you
I`m better off without you
More than you, more than you know
I`m slowly getting closure
I guess it`s really over
I`m finally getting better
Now I`m picking up the pieces
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
Cause the day I thought I`d never get through
I got over you
You took a hammer to these walls
Dragged the memories down the hall
Packed your bags and walked away
There was nothing I could say,
And when you slammed the front door shut
A lot of others opened up
So did my eyes so I could see
That you never were the best for me
[Chorus]
I never saw it coming
I should have started running
A long, long time ago
And I never thought I`d doubt you
I`m better off without you
And I never saw it coming
I should have started running
I`m finally getting better
Now I`m picking up the pieces
From spending all of these years
Putting my heart back together
And I got over you
And I got over you
And I got over you
The day I thought I`d never get through
I got over you
--------------------------------------------------
See the happy moron,
He doesn't give a damn.
I wish I were a moron,
Oh God, perhaps I am.
Its been (somewhat) a fun two years, and even though graduation isn't even here yet. And there's still prom and A levels itself, my jc journey seems just about over. There were pockets of regret and rejoicing here and there. Drama, action and effort aplenty. For one year and ten months~
Nevar Forget
Quote of e Post:
I`m slowly getting closure
I guess it`s really over
I`m finally getting better
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
Rockstars
I’m blogging from school, not really blogging blogging, since the school banned blogger- so I’m just typing this out in word and saving it on my PSP until I get home. I’ve got about half an hour until my next uhhh engagement (It’s about 1:30pm now) and as per usual we all have tons to do but hardly feel like touching any of it.
Results for prelims are almost all in. And it is dismal. Dystopian even, if we take a closer look at it. Let’s just have the rundown and ignore the pleasantries.
History: S (A slight improvement, considering I did one qn that wasn’t taught)
Econs: U (A major disappointment, like how badly can one misinterpret?)
Lit: E (No surprises here, wasn’t expecting much either)
Math: U (Once again, no surprises)
GP: C (THIS is the killer)
Like WHAT? C for GP? That was like my only saving grace right out the window. Paper 2 surprisingly wasn’t the mortal blow but the real one-two came from paper 1. I went totally off tangent and neglected to argue out the essay like an essay. Question was “Singaporean youths of today are not ready for the real world” and you, my valuable readers, knowing me~ will have deduced that I had a field day engaging in one of my most passionate rants. Completely defunct of analysis or substantiated reasoning, thus a failing content grade. Add it all up and I get a poor C. Not even a high C but a low C. If I had wanted to cry, those tears had dried up hours ago even before they left their shell. *wiffle*
This brings you up to speed with my poor mood and extinguished enthusiasm for life.
Found this song via radio. It’s just very amusing to me- go watch the MV, and then you’ll understand. (Clarifier, I’m in no way advocating such a lifestyle nor do I endorse such a dream)
Nickelback – [[Rockstar]]
I'm through with standing in line
To clubs we'll never get in
It's like the bottom of the ninth
And I'm never gonna win
This life hasn't turned out
Quite the way I want it to be
(Tell me what you want)
I want a brand new house
On an episode of Cribs
And a bathroom I can play baseball in
And a king size tub big enough
For ten plus me
(So what you need?)
I'll need a credit card that's got no limit
And a big black jet with a bedroom in it
Gonna join the mile high club
At thirty-seven thousand feet
(Been there, done that)
I want a new tour bus full of old guitars
My own star on Hollywood Boulevard
Somewhere between Cher and
James Dean is fine for me
(So how you gonna do it?)
I'm gonna trade this life for fortune and fame
I'd even cut my hair and change my name
[Chorus:]
'Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses driving fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We'll all stay skinny 'cause we just won't eat
And we'll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger's
Gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny
With her bleach blond hair
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
I wanna be great like Elvis without the tassels
Hire eight body guards that love to beat up assholes
Sign a couple autographs
So I can eat my meals for free
(I'll have the quesadilla, on the house)
I'm gonna dress my ass
With the latest fashion
Get a front door key to the Playboy mansion
Gonna date a centerfold that loves to
Blow my money for me
(So how you gonna do it?)
I'm gonna trade this life for fortune and fame
I'd even cut my hair and change my name
[Chorus]
And we'll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary and today's who's who
They'll get you anything with that evil smile
Everybody's got a drug dealer on speed dial
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
I'm gonna sing those songs
That offend the censors
Gonna pop my pills from a pez dispenser
I'll get washed-up singers writing all my songs
Lip sync em every night so I don't get 'em wrong
[Chorus]
And we'll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary and today's who's who
They'll get you anything with that evil smile
Everybody's got a drug dealer on speed dial
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
-----------------------------------------------------
Doesn’t quite glorify rock stars the way it seems to ne? <3
Chest physically tangibly aching and hurting.
Quote of e Post:
I'm gonna trade this life for fortune and fame...
Results for prelims are almost all in. And it is dismal. Dystopian even, if we take a closer look at it. Let’s just have the rundown and ignore the pleasantries.
History: S (A slight improvement, considering I did one qn that wasn’t taught)
Econs: U (A major disappointment, like how badly can one misinterpret?)
Lit: E (No surprises here, wasn’t expecting much either)
Math: U (Once again, no surprises)
GP: C (THIS is the killer)
Like WHAT? C for GP? That was like my only saving grace right out the window. Paper 2 surprisingly wasn’t the mortal blow but the real one-two came from paper 1. I went totally off tangent and neglected to argue out the essay like an essay. Question was “Singaporean youths of today are not ready for the real world” and you, my valuable readers, knowing me~ will have deduced that I had a field day engaging in one of my most passionate rants. Completely defunct of analysis or substantiated reasoning, thus a failing content grade. Add it all up and I get a poor C. Not even a high C but a low C. If I had wanted to cry, those tears had dried up hours ago even before they left their shell. *wiffle*
This brings you up to speed with my poor mood and extinguished enthusiasm for life.
Found this song via radio. It’s just very amusing to me- go watch the MV, and then you’ll understand. (Clarifier, I’m in no way advocating such a lifestyle nor do I endorse such a dream)
Nickelback – [[Rockstar]]
I'm through with standing in line
To clubs we'll never get in
It's like the bottom of the ninth
And I'm never gonna win
This life hasn't turned out
Quite the way I want it to be
(Tell me what you want)
I want a brand new house
On an episode of Cribs
And a bathroom I can play baseball in
And a king size tub big enough
For ten plus me
(So what you need?)
I'll need a credit card that's got no limit
And a big black jet with a bedroom in it
Gonna join the mile high club
At thirty-seven thousand feet
(Been there, done that)
I want a new tour bus full of old guitars
My own star on Hollywood Boulevard
Somewhere between Cher and
James Dean is fine for me
(So how you gonna do it?)
I'm gonna trade this life for fortune and fame
I'd even cut my hair and change my name
[Chorus:]
'Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
And live in hilltop houses driving fifteen cars
The girls come easy and the drugs come cheap
We'll all stay skinny 'cause we just won't eat
And we'll hang out in the coolest bars
In the VIP with the movie stars
Every good gold digger's
Gonna wind up there
Every Playboy bunny
With her bleach blond hair
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
I wanna be great like Elvis without the tassels
Hire eight body guards that love to beat up assholes
Sign a couple autographs
So I can eat my meals for free
(I'll have the quesadilla, on the house)
I'm gonna dress my ass
With the latest fashion
Get a front door key to the Playboy mansion
Gonna date a centerfold that loves to
Blow my money for me
(So how you gonna do it?)
I'm gonna trade this life for fortune and fame
I'd even cut my hair and change my name
[Chorus]
And we'll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary and today's who's who
They'll get you anything with that evil smile
Everybody's got a drug dealer on speed dial
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
I'm gonna sing those songs
That offend the censors
Gonna pop my pills from a pez dispenser
I'll get washed-up singers writing all my songs
Lip sync em every night so I don't get 'em wrong
[Chorus]
And we'll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary and today's who's who
They'll get you anything with that evil smile
Everybody's got a drug dealer on speed dial
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar
-----------------------------------------------------
Doesn’t quite glorify rock stars the way it seems to ne? <3
Chest physically tangibly aching and hurting.
Quote of e Post:
I'm gonna trade this life for fortune and fame...
Monday, October 01, 2007
Flashback 2nd Raid
I've just looked through my past posts on this blog and I've realized that I'm back where I was 3 years ago. More or less, except this time, the major differences are the players and my ability to change. Its funny then, and depressing to see this work in progress on hold for so long. And while I've stood still, and maybe even taken a few steps backwards- looking at the new people I've met in this time and the growth they've accomplished. I can't help but wonder where it all went wrong -again-.
When you think about NS, it really does feel as though your days are being numbered. Nothing can be done to avoid it and even if you delay it, its inevitable. Gosh the horror. All the second hand experiences in the world wont be able to prepare one for what is to come. And thats the worst part of it, you just cannot get ready enough for what you do not know. In that aspect alone, even NS is worse then A-levels.
I don't want to get my preliminary exam results back. Seriously. Its going to be so bad and as a reflection of my A-level results to come, I just may have to go to Polytechnic after army, just like Chelmin's classmate. By then, everyone would have moved on, to other higher levels of education or even joining the workforce and I- would be left behind again. Maybe, perhaps, in a weird twisted way, I want this? No more accurately, this scenario is playing itself out due to my subconscious manipulations which manifests itself as behavior that will most likely result in this ending. Its like a fear turned self-fulfilling prophecy. Question now is, with 30 days on the clock, can I beat it back? I reckon this is the only reason why I can't be motivated because subconsciously I do not want to be motivated and thus do not allow myself to become so. Messy messy messy.
I have no more reasons or excuses to give myself. This is just pathetic.
Quote of the Post:
Not poppy, nor mandragora,
Nor all the drowsy syrups of the world,
Shall ever medicine thee to that sweet sleep
Which thou owedst yesterday.
When you think about NS, it really does feel as though your days are being numbered. Nothing can be done to avoid it and even if you delay it, its inevitable. Gosh the horror. All the second hand experiences in the world wont be able to prepare one for what is to come. And thats the worst part of it, you just cannot get ready enough for what you do not know. In that aspect alone, even NS is worse then A-levels.
I don't want to get my preliminary exam results back. Seriously. Its going to be so bad and as a reflection of my A-level results to come, I just may have to go to Polytechnic after army, just like Chelmin's classmate. By then, everyone would have moved on, to other higher levels of education or even joining the workforce and I- would be left behind again. Maybe, perhaps, in a weird twisted way, I want this? No more accurately, this scenario is playing itself out due to my subconscious manipulations which manifests itself as behavior that will most likely result in this ending. Its like a fear turned self-fulfilling prophecy. Question now is, with 30 days on the clock, can I beat it back? I reckon this is the only reason why I can't be motivated because subconsciously I do not want to be motivated and thus do not allow myself to become so. Messy messy messy.
I have no more reasons or excuses to give myself. This is just pathetic.
Quote of the Post:
Not poppy, nor mandragora,
Nor all the drowsy syrups of the world,
Shall ever medicine thee to that sweet sleep
Which thou owedst yesterday.
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Que Sera Sera
1. The person who tagged you is?
--- Norman
A proper post will come soon. I promise.
Quote of e Post:
What will be will be.
--- Norman
2. Your relationship with him/her is?
--- Church mate
3. Your 5 impressions of him/her?
--- Lame, gamer, closet mugger, little tinge of pride, resilent
4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you?
--- Not sure lol. Washed Dutch Oven and chat until 6am in the morning :3
5. The most memorable words he/she had said to you?
--- LoL. Pwnt. (no seriously >.<)
6. If he/she becomes your lover, you will?
--- I will commit suicide. I swear I'm not gay~ if he's a she then... I'd love it haha xD
7. If he/she becomes your lover, things he/she has to improve on will be?
--- Less lame arguments pl0x
8. If he/she becomes your enemy, you will?
--- Kick him in the nuts (very tempting)
9. If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be?
--- Not sure really, its hard to imagine. Probably something big like a murder or smth lol.
10.The most desire thing you want to do for him/her now is?
--- Really no clue.
11.Your overall impression of him/her is?
--- Great guy, pity he has some teeny tiny ego flaws
12.How you think people around you will feel about you?
--- Depends on what people. To some, very lame, to some very cynical and annoying
13.The character you love of yourself are?
--- Able to entertain myself lol. No really, character wise? I can believe what i want to believe with full conviction.
14.On the contrary, the characters you hate of yourself are?
--- too indecisive, weak willed
15.The most ideal person you want to be is?
--- This is tough. Somewhere along the lines of Jonathan Jiang! Haha :)
16.Pass this quiz to 10 persons. (randomized for fun)
-1- Qian Xiang
-2- Chelmin
-3- Shan An
-4- Paula
-5- Shisei
-6- Fiona
-7- Shaun Sim
-8- Dilys
-9- Norman
-10- Jonathan Yuen
11. Who is no.6 having relationship with?
--- Not that I know of, dunno
12.Is no.9 a male or female?
--- I DONT KNOW WO LoL. Male. Manly GARsome male :)
13.If no.7 and 10 are together, will it be a good thing?
--- Hell no lol, they'll probably ignore one another
14.How about no.8 and 5?
--- (Whats the problem with the randomizer?) Yea, it'll be kinda fun. No, seriously.
15.What is no.2 studying about?
--- Mass Communications :) Gd job btw
16.When was the last time you had a chat with no.3?
--- A few weeks back, like a month maybe
17.What kind of music band does no.8 like?
--- Not sure, romantic oldies and Christian songs i guess
18.Does no.1 has any siblings?
--- Not this is tricky, I'm ashamed that I dunno
19.Will you woo no.3?
--- If he were female, I think we'd just clash haha.
20.How about no.7?
--- Once again, using above assumption: It'll be fun :) We'd game all day long haha
21.Is no.4 single?
--- Nope
22.What's the surname of no.5?
--- Lim
23.What's the hobby of no.4?
--- watching Asian dramas! Haha
24.Do no.5 and 9 get along well?
--- They don't know each other but I'm reckoning no
25.Where is no.2 studying at?
--- Polytechnic... uhh I forgot which one again (slap me)
26.Talk something casually about no.1?
--- He's alright once in a while, just a little too much quirk to get under.
27.Have you tried developing feelings for no.8?
--- Uhh, no?
28.Where does no.9 live at?
--- Near Hougang Point
29.What color does no.4 like?
--- I'm not sure, baby pink maybe. Ooh, white.
30.Are no.5 and 1 best friends?
--- Nope: dunno each other (stupid randomizer spoiling EVERYTHING)
31.Does no.7 likes no.2?
--- I'm not sure, they dunno each other. Once again, GOLDEN ASSUMPTIONS: not likely
32.How do you get to know no.2?
--- Through Norman. Nuff said.
33.Does no.1 have any pets?
--- Not that I know of.
34.Is no.7 the sexiest person in the world?
--- Holy: no, not to me perhaps. If I were a girl and I didn't know him, maybe :)
A proper post will come soon. I promise.
Quote of e Post:
What will be will be.
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