Twist Serve

Blogging today because it was too late last night. Went to send Edwin off at the airport yesterday. At fdirst I had my doubts, my reservations, we weren't exactly the best of friends, neither was there amy enemity between us, and I had to and face a ton of other people I have not met for at least 2 years. But I went anyway. It was more touching than I had prepared my self for. EVeryone was joyous, it would only be for one and a half years. No tears fell till the final moments, where his eyes could no longer look upon the group. No one could blame them. One and a half years isn't exactly a short time, the dutch courage we gave ourselves by saying we would be at the arrival hall welcoming him again before we knew fell apart the moment he turned his back for the last time.

It was touching yes. But It never really affected me deeply until he gave out a bag of stuff to his family of close friends. Part of that bag was his RSN (Royal Singapore Navy) NCC Specialist badge. It just hit me so hard then, this was something priceless, the 2-3 days of effort. The fun, discomfort and everything during spec course, and he left it for them. It was as if he was saying that a part of him will live on with each of them until the day he returns. Will he change? Who knows? People change, but we can't bear to sometimes, and if others do, we might not accpet it. I actually, I never thought I still had such feelings for my year, especially when I spent one year forcing myself to forget everything, I just can't. The PCSS graduates of 2004 are still the greatest bunch of people I've known. I will not regret turning back, try as I might, I can't forget you all (even though I have already forgotten some people, I will keep the rest, it will suffice for now)

One and a half years, in one and a half years when we all go back to welcome him again (It was the silence thereafter that forged that unspoken promise) where will we be? Many of them made it into Poly and a few into Jc. In one and a half year, December 2007. If all goes according to plan, Id have just finished my 2 years in Jc, those In Poly would also be in thier final year/term. I'd be what? 19? (!... #4... :) ...?) And so would everyone else. One and a half years is alot of time for changes to take place, what will change? For better, or worse? I still believe one thing. Do what you want in life, just never regret anything you have done.

Being with these people again, just reinforces really how pathetic this year's graduating classes are. I'm ashamed to be part of them. That isnt the Peicai I am proud of, no it isn't. Peicai really is not a bad place, it's a great school, but at the end of the day it is the people that make Peicai "Peicai", not the building, not the dis-tasteful brown uniform, not the "neighbourhood" location, it's the people in it, you, I and all our friends and teachers. Peicai is a great school. Ha, what's wrong with me?? So emotional :) But it's a warm feeling, better than trying to be tough and cold all the time, I can't be bothered anymore, there isn't reason to.

Just read Dily's blog, she's back from her camp! Good, just in time to make it for Youth Anni on Saturday :) Looking forward to it, spent the day slogging it out in the D&T workshop at school, nuff said. Got back early because too few people so cannot really continue (Out of our class of 26 D&T pupils only 5 were left) Need to compile some money, buy my electronics for D&T and carry on, being stuck here is horrible, I might not hit my deadline.

Certain things you think can only happen in reel life, on Tv or in stories but, yesterday was one of those "looks too false to be real but totally is" moments. It was brave, and yet must have been very difficult to leave it all behind and leave. Will there come a day when I too would have to do the same? Will I do the same? How many people will remember me when I'm gone/going? I'll end here, to go recompose myself :') haha, not really... it's very rare for me to cry. And even rarer for someone to witness it.

Just realised everytime I hit someone out of blind rage I'd be tearing, no idea why either. People weren't meant to fight, not like this. It ony creates sadness, suffering and unrest, which give birth to vengeance, and the cycle continues.

Quote of e Post:
People are actually really warmhearted...