Im leaving on a break.. not that I want to, but my net has been severed again. This time it will be for another 4 months or so but Im not too sure. But i assure you,
1) For all you who accepted my offer to be friends, I WILL type you a nice long testimony whenever I get the chance
2) You can E-mail me k? Ill try to check
3) Good luck! Exams are coming!!
4) My e-mail add is now faust_viii_sf@hotmail.com
5) Try to keep in contact k? After these few months you will be leaving this school forever, and I may never see you ever again... so yeah, regardless how, it will be hard to forget anyone you spent about 3 years of your life with no?
6) For WHO NEED NOT BE NAMED. Read your notepad thing ^_^
7) For all other friends who I will never see in real life, Its alright if you forget me, I won't forget you! (Esp, all e Janime peeps)
8) My last Quote ofthe post for a long time...
Don't say if I were you (say if I were you)
Or tell me what to do
How things would be if you were in my shoes
Cause you're not me
Please, help me if you can (help me if you can)
This isn't what I planned
Guess I don't expect that
You could understand
Cause you're not me...
Thursday, September 23, 2004
Saturday, September 18, 2004
Will I Live Up To Expectations?
Argh... feeling so ... I dont know how to describe... but see everyone in the hall, then here I am in class, feels very.. frustrating. Is wishing you "good luck" all I can do for you? Such a let down, I cant even be there physically to provide support save for that short recess period.
Recently Mr Paul waltzed into class, he was very disappointed with most of the class cos we were bad and stuff, you know then he began to talk about the sec4's in the hall taking their prelims, then he actaully pointed Me and Lee Lin out and said we SHOULD BE IN THE HALL NOW!! How inconsiderate, say why didnt he pick out Gibson? Cos he knows that Gibson couldnt make it?
Anyways, After my excellent performance all year (compared to the rest of the class at least) Im feeling very scared now. On one hand I know it should be a piece of cake and that if I studied it would be no problem passing 3 Express but then what if I DO? Will I survive sec 4? Sound terrible to me (from what Ive heard) ... *gulp* Will I live up to expectation for the End of Year exams? I know you are probrably dismissing this with a swish saying, "Pfft! End of year? We are duking out in our prelims NOW! That is SO MUCH more vital than your end of year exams!" I know! But Im worried that I cant live up to expectations, doubts are creeping in and my confidence is slowly beng shaken as I realise that I NEED to study and I can't without my books... damn...
I found out that my little stunt of making an alternate account to log into my computer is pretty pathatic. First off I can only use the comp when NO ONE is around, and that is like VERY RARE. So I preactically gave myself a back door which I know is open but I will never get a chance to use. Also with the exams coming, I doubt i will use it even if I get a chance anyway. Study is more important...
Got exam schedules on Friday, 19 days to End of Years! (Counting today) This time they decided to make life a little more iritating by making MT the first paper. And making the first day of the exams a FRIDAY! And on that day we have Mt1 and MT2, They are obviously trying to kill me right? Throw me MT all in one shot then give me a weekend to worry about it.... grr... how evil.
Quote of the post:
I'm trying to keep, The ground under my feet
It seems the world's falling down around me
The nights are all long, I'm singing this song
Trying to and make the answers more than maybe
And Im so confused, About what to do
Sometimes I just want to throw it all away
Recently Mr Paul waltzed into class, he was very disappointed with most of the class cos we were bad and stuff, you know then he began to talk about the sec4's in the hall taking their prelims, then he actaully pointed Me and Lee Lin out and said we SHOULD BE IN THE HALL NOW!! How inconsiderate, say why didnt he pick out Gibson? Cos he knows that Gibson couldnt make it?
Anyways, After my excellent performance all year (compared to the rest of the class at least) Im feeling very scared now. On one hand I know it should be a piece of cake and that if I studied it would be no problem passing 3 Express but then what if I DO? Will I survive sec 4? Sound terrible to me (from what Ive heard) ... *gulp* Will I live up to expectation for the End of Year exams? I know you are probrably dismissing this with a swish saying, "Pfft! End of year? We are duking out in our prelims NOW! That is SO MUCH more vital than your end of year exams!" I know! But Im worried that I cant live up to expectations, doubts are creeping in and my confidence is slowly beng shaken as I realise that I NEED to study and I can't without my books... damn...
I found out that my little stunt of making an alternate account to log into my computer is pretty pathatic. First off I can only use the comp when NO ONE is around, and that is like VERY RARE. So I preactically gave myself a back door which I know is open but I will never get a chance to use. Also with the exams coming, I doubt i will use it even if I get a chance anyway. Study is more important...
Got exam schedules on Friday, 19 days to End of Years! (Counting today) This time they decided to make life a little more iritating by making MT the first paper. And making the first day of the exams a FRIDAY! And on that day we have Mt1 and MT2, They are obviously trying to kill me right? Throw me MT all in one shot then give me a weekend to worry about it.... grr... how evil.
Quote of the post:
I'm trying to keep, The ground under my feet
It seems the world's falling down around me
The nights are all long, I'm singing this song
Trying to and make the answers more than maybe
And Im so confused, About what to do
Sometimes I just want to throw it all away
Tuesday, September 14, 2004
The Bi-Annual Battle for control... AGAIN
Sigh, It has been 4 days sinceI updated, I want to say so much but there is just NO TIME. Huh? Dont get it? I will explain but let me start with a short story...
My STUPID IDIOTIC father says I spend too much time on the computer, so one fine day, he kept the mouse, being resourceful, I bought another (didnt cost too much). So he becoming NO wiser, now kept the keyboard, once again I managed to find another (We have an old computer). Wisening up a little he took the monitor, Simple problem! I took the old monitor (Again, we have an old computer), then in another stupid attempt he took the cable connecting the modem to the computer, wow! Im stumped, if not for the fact that that cable is easily found in stores and I promptly bought a roll of it (wait, let me finish). Finally at a loss of what to do, he does the "most" intelligent thing ever, he moved the entire computer to another room, THIS is where my roll of cable came in handy, I actually got about 20 metres of it! More then enough to strech one room (the other room had no point to plug the modem in). And finally, the desperate move I could not stop. He took the entire CPU away, rotf!!
Thus began the bi or tri annual battle. During the next holidays he will return with whatever he took, and I would be able to use the computer again ^_^ But as this continued EVERY year, it got terriblly distrupting, friends and contacts are lost every three or six months depending as my e-mail account would be disabled. Old passwords would be forgotten, message boards and forums would abandon me after my long period of abscence, my presence lost.
Once again this year, in June I got my computer back (JoY) But it was not until late July that I once more got internet back. So now about three months after getting it back, it starts again, he once again demands that I spend too much time and promptly wants to remove it with a difference, this time it will be until AFTER my Os!! This time I could not act indifferent, couldnt ignore no more. I fought back, and to a certain extent.. I won! However now instead of unlimited usage as long as I had free time (as imposed by myself before) I am now ristricted to using the computer THREE MEASLY HOURS a day, 8pm to 11pm. (He set a password so that no one could use windows without it,)
But! Being stupid as he is, the suer he lets me log on as in is... you guessed it! Administrator! I could have laughed my ASS off, I promptly took the first opportunity once he wasn't looking to edit the settings so that he could still input the password to log into the admin account but I also inculded I can just CANCEL the log-in page and just use it! Not that he knows... heh heh, If my parents EVER stumble upon this blog, I am DEAD.
Anyway, back on topic, life has been damn cute to me. Like I said before, if I gain something, I will lose something in return, I almost thought I lost my comp in exchange for... uhh... some thing else. But with this settling fine, I don't know what life will throw me next. I dare not imagine.
I was going through some of my old stuff when I found some of my last year books. It has almost been one whole year and yet the propect of taking the Os with unfamiliar people still freaks me a little. Ahh... no point complaining, seems like many people in 3E is trying to emulate my miraculous semi-concious learning style. Huh? As per usual, I enjoy the occasional leisurely nap in class, and somehow still come up tops, they think that by sleeping in class they will do well? Um, sorry to burst your bubble people, but I had to sacrifice ONE YEAR to "learn" this skill and trust me, It aint worth it. Everytime a test comes back and they gape and gawk, I remind them, that I wasted a year to get these marks, definately NOT worth it.
Also, I would like to say a big sorry, dui4 bu4 ci1 or gomenasai (if you prefer...) to that-someone. Dont take it to heart, they were just having some fun, but at your expense? Im sorry, I didnt exactly say anything, they justput two and two together and .. they got the picture, hope you are alright. Once again, they did act like jerks who did not take your feelings into consideration. On their behalf and from me, sorry!
I will end now... my time is almost up... GTG now, so much to say, so little time. bye bye!
Quote of the post:
We might not have much now
But we should keep living
That day might be far away in the future
But as long as we keep on
One day we will be glad that we survived
Keep searching that empty street, maybe
Just maybe, one day we might find something
Like the moon that floats alone in the night sky...
My STUPID IDIOTIC father says I spend too much time on the computer, so one fine day, he kept the mouse, being resourceful, I bought another (didnt cost too much). So he becoming NO wiser, now kept the keyboard, once again I managed to find another (We have an old computer). Wisening up a little he took the monitor, Simple problem! I took the old monitor (Again, we have an old computer), then in another stupid attempt he took the cable connecting the modem to the computer, wow! Im stumped, if not for the fact that that cable is easily found in stores and I promptly bought a roll of it (wait, let me finish). Finally at a loss of what to do, he does the "most" intelligent thing ever, he moved the entire computer to another room, THIS is where my roll of cable came in handy, I actually got about 20 metres of it! More then enough to strech one room (the other room had no point to plug the modem in). And finally, the desperate move I could not stop. He took the entire CPU away, rotf!!
Thus began the bi or tri annual battle. During the next holidays he will return with whatever he took, and I would be able to use the computer again ^_^ But as this continued EVERY year, it got terriblly distrupting, friends and contacts are lost every three or six months depending as my e-mail account would be disabled. Old passwords would be forgotten, message boards and forums would abandon me after my long period of abscence, my presence lost.
Once again this year, in June I got my computer back (JoY) But it was not until late July that I once more got internet back. So now about three months after getting it back, it starts again, he once again demands that I spend too much time and promptly wants to remove it with a difference, this time it will be until AFTER my Os!! This time I could not act indifferent, couldnt ignore no more. I fought back, and to a certain extent.. I won! However now instead of unlimited usage as long as I had free time (as imposed by myself before) I am now ristricted to using the computer THREE MEASLY HOURS a day, 8pm to 11pm. (He set a password so that no one could use windows without it,)
But! Being stupid as he is, the suer he lets me log on as in is... you guessed it! Administrator! I could have laughed my ASS off, I promptly took the first opportunity once he wasn't looking to edit the settings so that he could still input the password to log into the admin account but I also inculded I can just CANCEL the log-in page and just use it! Not that he knows... heh heh, If my parents EVER stumble upon this blog, I am DEAD.
Anyway, back on topic, life has been damn cute to me. Like I said before, if I gain something, I will lose something in return, I almost thought I lost my comp in exchange for... uhh... some thing else. But with this settling fine, I don't know what life will throw me next. I dare not imagine.
I was going through some of my old stuff when I found some of my last year books. It has almost been one whole year and yet the propect of taking the Os with unfamiliar people still freaks me a little. Ahh... no point complaining, seems like many people in 3E is trying to emulate my miraculous semi-concious learning style. Huh? As per usual, I enjoy the occasional leisurely nap in class, and somehow still come up tops, they think that by sleeping in class they will do well? Um, sorry to burst your bubble people, but I had to sacrifice ONE YEAR to "learn" this skill and trust me, It aint worth it. Everytime a test comes back and they gape and gawk, I remind them, that I wasted a year to get these marks, definately NOT worth it.
Also, I would like to say a big sorry, dui4 bu4 ci1 or gomenasai (if you prefer...) to that-someone. Dont take it to heart, they were just having some fun, but at your expense? Im sorry, I didnt exactly say anything, they justput two and two together and .. they got the picture, hope you are alright. Once again, they did act like jerks who did not take your feelings into consideration. On their behalf and from me, sorry!
I will end now... my time is almost up... GTG now, so much to say, so little time. bye bye!
Quote of the post:
We might not have much now
But we should keep living
That day might be far away in the future
But as long as we keep on
One day we will be glad that we survived
Keep searching that empty street, maybe
Just maybe, one day we might find something
Like the moon that floats alone in the night sky...
Saturday, September 11, 2004
Eh? It works now.. lol
What? Blogger is acting up again, or is it my comp just screwed? Whatever... at least it works now lol....
This morning got English Oral, Wah I got the earlier timeslot at 8am so early! Must drag myself out of bed X_X Im very lazy one you know? Anyway, I was in the earliest timeslot at 8am, the other one was at 10am... Classroom was 2B... at 7:40 still got no one open the door! All the other classes the teacher already opened the door and was preparing the tables and chairs, no sooner was I about to think that I got the wrong classroom, Miss Kodi waltzed up the stairs balancing a cup of coffee on a pile of files with the class key dangling off her finger.
I thought like, DIE ALREADY!! We got Kodi and I was really REALLY nervous. But she turned out fine, I cruised through the reading, but had a little nervous attack later on during picture discussion, she kept asking and asking SO many questions I thought, "Die already, everyone knows the examiner will prompt you if you do not give enough content.." But end up at the end she was vey nice, and even said I did very well, obviously not aiming to pass but shooting to score, even said I got a Band 1 but because I was too nervous and rushed hte whole thing abit missign out some small details I will not be getting the highest possible score... oh well, nerve wrecking enough, but worth it ^_^
Holidays end in two days but I have not started on ANY work.. gotta keep on! Cna't get all slack just because of a one week so caleld holiday lolx... Lets see, I've got 36 Du Hou Gan to do... 5 weeks worth of jian bao, a english letter thing, and some math questions... WOAH! Chinese SO MUCH?! What can I say? She keep our files for so long... what to do? Stress... Stres... Stress...
Must change my MSN sig liao... Im fast running out of ideas and my current one is getting stale but hey! I still like it k? It can apply to all sorts of things, in all parts of life to provide encouragement. Why do I persist? Because I know I have a chance... How true ^_^
Today went for a small outing to Pasir Ris beach... dammnit, those organizers never say must bring extra clothes and slippers, end up must go into the sand and got sand in my shoes X_X Good thing i took off my shoes before entering the sand so I managed to brush off most of the sand before most of the REAL damage has been done. As for the water? I just didnt go down, simple as that... stayed until pretty late just stoning with the others... for once, in a long time... I feel part of a group, of something... feels nice ^_^
Anyway! Im looking for anyone who can give me the Singers of these two chinese songs, and to reccomend any other songs that are nice! The first song title is Yong Qi (Courage, the lyrics are as follows hope blogger can display chinese words...)
?¤_°µ¤F???©w
?¤H«ç¤\?§Ú¤£²z
¥un§A¤]¤@?ªºªÖ©w
§Úº@·N¤Ñ²P®ü¨¤³£?§A¥h
§Úª¾¹D¤@¤Á¤£®e©ö
§Úªº¤ß¤@ª½???ªA¦Û¤v
³Ì©È§A©¿µM?n©ñ?
[Chorus]
?¯uªº»Ýn«iÉa
?±?¬y¨¥ãò?
¥un§A¤@?²´¯«ªÖ©w
§Úªº?´N¦³·N?
§Ú?³£»Ýn«iÉa
¥h¬Û«H?¦b¤@°_
¤H¼é??§Ú¯à·P?§A
©ñ¦b§Ú¤â¤ß¨½§Aªº¯u¤ß
?¤_°µ¤F???©w
?¤H«ç¤\?§Ú¤£²z
¥un§A¤]¤@?ªºªÖ©w
§Úº@·N¤Ñ²P®ü¨¤³£?§A¥h
§Úª¾¹D¤@¤Á¤£®e©ö
§Úªº¤ß¤@ª½???ªA¦Û¤v
³Ì©È§A©¿µM?n©ñ?
[Chorus]
¦pªG§Úªº??¥ô©Ê
?¤£¤p¤ß?®`¤F§A
§A¯à¤£¯à?¬X´£¿ô
§Ú?µM¤ß¤Ó«æ§ó®`©È??§A
[Chorus]
The second song is Titled Di Xia Tie, Yup, from the movie of the same name / sound of colors
[1]
¥i§v?
?ªº¥X¤f
§Ú?Y«ö?¯Á?ªº¨«
¬O§_´N¯à§ä±o¨ì
[2]
¶Â©]¤F¥Õ?
¬K®L¤S¬î¥V
¤@¤ÑÎ`¤@¤Ñ
¤@©P¤S¤@©P³£??
¦b¤H¸s¤¤§Ú?À¿ªÓ¦Ó?
¦b«°¥«ªº©I§l¨½¨IÀq´å¨«
±´¯Á¤@¥÷¦Û¤v´÷±æ¤w¤[ªº?¬X
?§äµÛ¡C¡C¡C
[1]
?¬ü?ªº?¹ø
??©Û¤â
?§Ú?¬ï±ô?¤F±I¹æ
¥u?ÀOi???
[2]
¦b¤H¸s¤¤§Ú?À¿ªÓ¦Ó?
¦b«°¥«ªº©I§l¨½¨IÀq´å¨«
±´¯Á¤@¥÷¦Û¤v´÷±æ¤w¤[ªº?¬X
[2]
?¦b¤H¸s¤¤
?§CµÛ?°µ?
§Ú?¦b¤H¸s¤¤À¿ªÓ¦Ó?
¦b«°¥«ªº©I§l¨½¨IÀq´å¨«
§Úª¾¹D§A?¦b¨º¤@?
§Ú?´N¦b?ªº¨º¤@¬í¸I?
¤U¤@¯¸ªº¥X¤f¦³¤Hµ¥§Ú¦³¤Hµ¥§Ú
¤U¤@¯¸ªº¥X¤f§Aµ¥µÛ§Ú
These are the lyrics for both these songs, I already have their MP3 and I really like them... im trying to memorise them but I still need a TON of practice, oh well thats all for this entry! Bye Bye! Till next time!
Quote of the post:
You can’t understand anyone just by appearances,
They don’t want to show their unmade-up face.
This morning got English Oral, Wah I got the earlier timeslot at 8am so early! Must drag myself out of bed X_X Im very lazy one you know? Anyway, I was in the earliest timeslot at 8am, the other one was at 10am... Classroom was 2B... at 7:40 still got no one open the door! All the other classes the teacher already opened the door and was preparing the tables and chairs, no sooner was I about to think that I got the wrong classroom, Miss Kodi waltzed up the stairs balancing a cup of coffee on a pile of files with the class key dangling off her finger.
I thought like, DIE ALREADY!! We got Kodi and I was really REALLY nervous. But she turned out fine, I cruised through the reading, but had a little nervous attack later on during picture discussion, she kept asking and asking SO many questions I thought, "Die already, everyone knows the examiner will prompt you if you do not give enough content.." But end up at the end she was vey nice, and even said I did very well, obviously not aiming to pass but shooting to score, even said I got a Band 1 but because I was too nervous and rushed hte whole thing abit missign out some small details I will not be getting the highest possible score... oh well, nerve wrecking enough, but worth it ^_^
Holidays end in two days but I have not started on ANY work.. gotta keep on! Cna't get all slack just because of a one week so caleld holiday lolx... Lets see, I've got 36 Du Hou Gan to do... 5 weeks worth of jian bao, a english letter thing, and some math questions... WOAH! Chinese SO MUCH?! What can I say? She keep our files for so long... what to do? Stress... Stres... Stress...
Must change my MSN sig liao... Im fast running out of ideas and my current one is getting stale but hey! I still like it k? It can apply to all sorts of things, in all parts of life to provide encouragement. Why do I persist? Because I know I have a chance... How true ^_^
Today went for a small outing to Pasir Ris beach... dammnit, those organizers never say must bring extra clothes and slippers, end up must go into the sand and got sand in my shoes X_X Good thing i took off my shoes before entering the sand so I managed to brush off most of the sand before most of the REAL damage has been done. As for the water? I just didnt go down, simple as that... stayed until pretty late just stoning with the others... for once, in a long time... I feel part of a group, of something... feels nice ^_^
Anyway! Im looking for anyone who can give me the Singers of these two chinese songs, and to reccomend any other songs that are nice! The first song title is Yong Qi (Courage, the lyrics are as follows hope blogger can display chinese words...)
?¤_°µ¤F???©w
?¤H«ç¤\?§Ú¤£²z
¥un§A¤]¤@?ªºªÖ©w
§Úº@·N¤Ñ²P®ü¨¤³£?§A¥h
§Úª¾¹D¤@¤Á¤£®e©ö
§Úªº¤ß¤@ª½???ªA¦Û¤v
³Ì©È§A©¿µM?n©ñ?
[Chorus]
?¯uªº»Ýn«iÉa
?±?¬y¨¥ãò?
¥un§A¤@?²´¯«ªÖ©w
§Úªº?´N¦³·N?
§Ú?³£»Ýn«iÉa
¥h¬Û«H?¦b¤@°_
¤H¼é??§Ú¯à·P?§A
©ñ¦b§Ú¤â¤ß¨½§Aªº¯u¤ß
?¤_°µ¤F???©w
?¤H«ç¤\?§Ú¤£²z
¥un§A¤]¤@?ªºªÖ©w
§Úº@·N¤Ñ²P®ü¨¤³£?§A¥h
§Úª¾¹D¤@¤Á¤£®e©ö
§Úªº¤ß¤@ª½???ªA¦Û¤v
³Ì©È§A©¿µM?n©ñ?
[Chorus]
¦pªG§Úªº??¥ô©Ê
?¤£¤p¤ß?®`¤F§A
§A¯à¤£¯à?¬X´£¿ô
§Ú?µM¤ß¤Ó«æ§ó®`©È??§A
[Chorus]
The second song is Titled Di Xia Tie, Yup, from the movie of the same name / sound of colors
[1]
¥i§v?
?ªº¥X¤f
§Ú?Y«ö?¯Á?ªº¨«
¬O§_´N¯à§ä±o¨ì
[2]
¶Â©]¤F¥Õ?
¬K®L¤S¬î¥V
¤@¤ÑÎ`¤@¤Ñ
¤@©P¤S¤@©P³£??
¦b¤H¸s¤¤§Ú?À¿ªÓ¦Ó?
¦b«°¥«ªº©I§l¨½¨IÀq´å¨«
±´¯Á¤@¥÷¦Û¤v´÷±æ¤w¤[ªº?¬X
?§äµÛ¡C¡C¡C
[1]
?¬ü?ªº?¹ø
??©Û¤â
?§Ú?¬ï±ô?¤F±I¹æ
¥u?ÀOi???
[2]
¦b¤H¸s¤¤§Ú?À¿ªÓ¦Ó?
¦b«°¥«ªº©I§l¨½¨IÀq´å¨«
±´¯Á¤@¥÷¦Û¤v´÷±æ¤w¤[ªº?¬X
[2]
?¦b¤H¸s¤¤
?§CµÛ?°µ?
§Ú?¦b¤H¸s¤¤À¿ªÓ¦Ó?
¦b«°¥«ªº©I§l¨½¨IÀq´å¨«
§Úª¾¹D§A?¦b¨º¤@?
§Ú?´N¦b?ªº¨º¤@¬í¸I?
¤U¤@¯¸ªº¥X¤f¦³¤Hµ¥§Ú¦³¤Hµ¥§Ú
¤U¤@¯¸ªº¥X¤f§Aµ¥µÛ§Ú
These are the lyrics for both these songs, I already have their MP3 and I really like them... im trying to memorise them but I still need a TON of practice, oh well thats all for this entry! Bye Bye! Till next time!
Quote of the post:
You can’t understand anyone just by appearances,
They don’t want to show their unmade-up face.
Wednesday, September 08, 2004
Not Really Holidays.... (3rd try to post...)
Woah!! I forgot to blog last night... Just couldnt wake up... lolx. Cos usually i go to slp and then wake up at about 1 am to come online, but last night seems like i could'nt get up... oh well, so i will make up now ^_^
Oh no! Im turning this blog into a commitment... once sopmething turns into something you feel like you have an obligation to do, you quickly loses interest and in due time get totally sianz by it. Blogging MUST NOT Turn into a cimmitment to fufil, I must do it regularly because I LIKE TO not because I HAVE TO. That too is the reason why studying certain subjects you like is easier than studying for subjects you dont ^_^ (No brainer right?)
Anyway... wah... this one week holiday is passing too fast for me to catch up... this morning got chinese oral, Ms Chan say I never fail, but as per usual not too good... The reading part was on how youth react to seats on public transport like on the MRT etc, like if they give em up to the needey, or they pretend never see anything... Then discussion is on wheather Singaporeans like to gamble and how some shops rip off tourists by charging higher than normal prices... I still think I should have said more X_X
Out of the one week holidays, I've got school from tuesday to friday and so far there are two more days to go (^_^ JOY!). I mean seriously anyone who got a break for fun out of this holiday must be slacking a whole lot... Come on, the sec 4s are busy cramming for their exams soon, this one week is the "calm before the storm" or so to speak lolx. Hiya, after living with Singapore educatio nsystem for so long should have gotten used to this sort of chi guai life liao, at least take pride in our high standard of education ^_^
Enough rambling on about school. Life has been really nice to me... nothing evil pops up spoiling this holiday for me... wonder what im goingto lose now... After all it is a give and take, everytime something good happens I will lose something in return, be it a heavier loss or a lighter one I will always lose somthing, NOTHING in life is free. Dont you agree?
Life is too perfect now, somehow work has become easy, study is second nature.. wait, that is creepy... but whats so bad about good grades? On the other hand my grades are FAR from good... In fact I dare say Im a little disappointed (Im sure many of you want to kill me now... if you saw my CA2 results. How can you say
that is not good enough?!) I CANNOT afford to fail this year and by the looks of things... I wont be ^_^
I recently walked past the 4I classroom and I saw two desks at the far end of the classroom next to the cupboard, did that mean there was origianlly supposed to be 42 people? I know me and Lee Lin retained but.. if so hwy wouls they get etxra desks? Im feeling so touched (lolx)
Thats all for this entry, I have not began on my holiday homework and it is what? Only a few days left.. better get cracking.. cya!
Quote of the Post:
Why do I persist?
Because I know I have a chance...
Oh no! Im turning this blog into a commitment... once sopmething turns into something you feel like you have an obligation to do, you quickly loses interest and in due time get totally sianz by it. Blogging MUST NOT Turn into a cimmitment to fufil, I must do it regularly because I LIKE TO not because I HAVE TO. That too is the reason why studying certain subjects you like is easier than studying for subjects you dont ^_^ (No brainer right?)
Anyway... wah... this one week holiday is passing too fast for me to catch up... this morning got chinese oral, Ms Chan say I never fail, but as per usual not too good... The reading part was on how youth react to seats on public transport like on the MRT etc, like if they give em up to the needey, or they pretend never see anything... Then discussion is on wheather Singaporeans like to gamble and how some shops rip off tourists by charging higher than normal prices... I still think I should have said more X_X
Out of the one week holidays, I've got school from tuesday to friday and so far there are two more days to go (^_^ JOY!). I mean seriously anyone who got a break for fun out of this holiday must be slacking a whole lot... Come on, the sec 4s are busy cramming for their exams soon, this one week is the "calm before the storm" or so to speak lolx. Hiya, after living with Singapore educatio nsystem for so long should have gotten used to this sort of chi guai life liao, at least take pride in our high standard of education ^_^
Enough rambling on about school. Life has been really nice to me... nothing evil pops up spoiling this holiday for me... wonder what im goingto lose now... After all it is a give and take, everytime something good happens I will lose something in return, be it a heavier loss or a lighter one I will always lose somthing, NOTHING in life is free. Dont you agree?
Life is too perfect now, somehow work has become easy, study is second nature.. wait, that is creepy... but whats so bad about good grades? On the other hand my grades are FAR from good... In fact I dare say Im a little disappointed (Im sure many of you want to kill me now... if you saw my CA2 results. How can you say
that is not good enough?!) I CANNOT afford to fail this year and by the looks of things... I wont be ^_^
I recently walked past the 4I classroom and I saw two desks at the far end of the classroom next to the cupboard, did that mean there was origianlly supposed to be 42 people? I know me and Lee Lin retained but.. if so hwy wouls they get etxra desks? Im feeling so touched (lolx)
Thats all for this entry, I have not began on my holiday homework and it is what? Only a few days left.. better get cracking.. cya!
Quote of the Post:
Why do I persist?
Because I know I have a chance...
Sunday, September 05, 2004
JusT TireD OuT...
Damn, I was out of town all day today... Some sort of one day trip to Malaysia. Now pretty tired cos I had to wake up at what? 7am to go catch the bus, I don't even know where in Malaysia I went lolx.
Pity, my hp can't work in Malaysia, well I can make and recieve calls but the SMS function can't be used... sadly, I managed to get by with the raido until we went further into Malaysia and my handphone stopped receiving our local channels and I could not get any of the Malaysian channels. So boring I seriously had NO IDEA what was happening half the time lolx.
I think I've somehow become bolder... more naughty? More daring? Most of the time when you get on a bus or coach you head straight for the end right? Well that's what I did.. a VERY BAD choice. The reasons will be damn stupid. First, when you sit right at the back, when the road gets bumpy...good luck! Second, when you sit at the back, it is hard to get down cos the exit is IN FRONT.. and thirdly, when during the trip and everyone is sleeping you cant turn behind and take pics of cute gals who are like half sprawled over each other... Oo~ weird right? Yea, I feel like im very OOC lately... it is not my nature to act this way... don't know why...
Phantom pains... you ever got a sharp pain in ANY part of your body for NO reason? I get it like really often, around the sides of my gut and in my chest... seems scary but when it blows over I feel strange, like it hurt so damn badly one second and a few minutes later it is like nothing ever happened... But im still worried that it may be some illness or something...
Great News!!! My CA2 results are out and these are REAL insults... I have prob never had a nicer page to show around. Besides a little let down that my english this time only got a A2 instead of the expected A1... almost everything is too fine... Chinese pass, math B3, and everything else A1s ^_^ Don't know how I managed to pull it off...
Now Im still waiting... after exchanging so many messages, I still have not gotten a direct YES or NO, to tell the truth, I dont really want to know... Even the anticipation of knowing burns me up and eats me inside constantly. Problem is what will be expected of me if the answer is yes? And if the answer is NO, how will it handle? Can we still be friends? Or will that akwardness exist forever like a scar, a painful memory. Or will it just fade like the memory of an uneventful parade?
Im not thinking of second thoughts, no, the moment I sent that message I had this mental ready-ness, i had to. I wasted 3 years on this and if I dint act now it would be too late. As this year comes to an end... and everyone else is rotating out of my life into thier life after secondary school, im left wondering, how many people will be left after the dust settles? How many familiar nameless faces....
Quote of the day:
You dont know how much you've got, until you lose it...
You don't feel how much you've lost, till it haunts you
Pity, my hp can't work in Malaysia, well I can make and recieve calls but the SMS function can't be used... sadly, I managed to get by with the raido until we went further into Malaysia and my handphone stopped receiving our local channels and I could not get any of the Malaysian channels. So boring I seriously had NO IDEA what was happening half the time lolx.
I think I've somehow become bolder... more naughty? More daring? Most of the time when you get on a bus or coach you head straight for the end right? Well that's what I did.. a VERY BAD choice. The reasons will be damn stupid. First, when you sit right at the back, when the road gets bumpy...good luck! Second, when you sit at the back, it is hard to get down cos the exit is IN FRONT.. and thirdly, when during the trip and everyone is sleeping you cant turn behind and take pics of cute gals who are like half sprawled over each other... Oo~ weird right? Yea, I feel like im very OOC lately... it is not my nature to act this way... don't know why...
Phantom pains... you ever got a sharp pain in ANY part of your body for NO reason? I get it like really often, around the sides of my gut and in my chest... seems scary but when it blows over I feel strange, like it hurt so damn badly one second and a few minutes later it is like nothing ever happened... But im still worried that it may be some illness or something...
Great News!!! My CA2 results are out and these are REAL insults... I have prob never had a nicer page to show around. Besides a little let down that my english this time only got a A2 instead of the expected A1... almost everything is too fine... Chinese pass, math B3, and everything else A1s ^_^ Don't know how I managed to pull it off...
Now Im still waiting... after exchanging so many messages, I still have not gotten a direct YES or NO, to tell the truth, I dont really want to know... Even the anticipation of knowing burns me up and eats me inside constantly. Problem is what will be expected of me if the answer is yes? And if the answer is NO, how will it handle? Can we still be friends? Or will that akwardness exist forever like a scar, a painful memory. Or will it just fade like the memory of an uneventful parade?
Im not thinking of second thoughts, no, the moment I sent that message I had this mental ready-ness, i had to. I wasted 3 years on this and if I dint act now it would be too late. As this year comes to an end... and everyone else is rotating out of my life into thier life after secondary school, im left wondering, how many people will be left after the dust settles? How many familiar nameless faces....
Quote of the day:
You dont know how much you've got, until you lose it...
You don't feel how much you've lost, till it haunts you
Friday, September 03, 2004
It GoT ThrougH... WhaT HavE I DonE?!
The message... it finally got through. I don't know if I should feel relieved or worried. Anyway, the reaction was no less than I expected. But she was unusually calm for what she has just gone through... she might sound clam but maybe she's swaeting needles on the other line... well at least I knew I WAS sweating Iron Blocks. The reaction was not too severe, she just was like.. What? Are you talking about what I THINK you are talking about? So cute ... ^^ Anyway ill just wait and see how it unfolds but for now, Im happy that I managed to get the message accross, before it is too late. JOY! Must Work harD!
Thursday, September 02, 2004
WaS It a MistakE FroM ThE StarT?
Im feeling real bouncy (don't ask) today, cos Im dead happy (funny phrase.. dead <-> happy [?]) Maybe it is becuase there is but one more day left till the end of this term. Even though we all know we won't be free this one week "holiday" there still is comfort in the knowledge that it IS a holiday week.
Like my title, I don't know if I have done the right thing... And if you are reading this it should clear things up a bit. I was not trying to make you guess... I was just .. not trying to be too obvious.... Yeah. After plucking up that courage the second attempt to reach out for my goal, heaven has made a fool of me again. You never got the underlying message... ahh my fair lady, not MY fair lady, but let me ask you, do you allow yourself to be MY fair lady? (This is as direct as it gets... my ears are burning already.. so embarassing)
Heaven does make great sport of me, taunting, twisting... teasing. Is it a good thing you never understood? Or was it just fate that was not meant to be... Like I said, I DONT believe in fate, what you want must be achieved with your own hands and thus I tried. Weather I succeed or fail, I will end up confused and dis-orienteated. As I wait for the final result of this... my mind is numb. The time is far from perfect, there are millions of things more important to focus on at the moment, the Os and Prelims are creeping nearer and nearer, the year ends are catching up... But this last few months are like they are, the LAST FEW months. If I don't act now, I will lose the chance forever...
I know that after this, or even now. People change... Im being very selfish. I like you as you are now, please don't change, so I put it to you before it is too late... before you change... The signs of change are already very evident in you... I really am hanging on to this last chance...
Getting back CA2 results tommrrow... after all I did today, results, studies all seem so insignificant. Two posts ago, I shot a flaming arrow out onto the unexpecting public but now... I've been shot by my very OWN arrow. I have decided to edit or delete that post, Feeling so damn stupid now. Funny how life decides to throw you things when you really don't expect it?
Things in the past, things yet unseen, wishes and dreams that are yet to come true, all those regrets... no where to go but up. Yeah, up. Stupid right? Yup sounds real stupid but Up is the way to go. Once again I stare at the sky and ask myself, "Is there a God up there?" Im SUPPOSED to be a christian. The keyword? SUPPOSED. If I call myself a christian, I am a very bad christian. We are supposed to believe, unwavering faith in our God. Silent, always watching over his children, welcoming all who come to him with a willing heart, wholeheartedly. (Im breaking this up or it will be too big a chunk)
Well, I dont know, maybe I think too much... but I seriously doubt whenever I pray or whatever. I never hear God's voice, ever. I can't recieve the gift of tounges... all I have to do is believe and seek ernestly it seems but there is always half of my mind... asking, questioning... What is it going to be like? How will it feel? How will it sound? And then the nothingness... Im sick of trying... Sick of keeping up this act. Yes, many have preached about the kind of person I am... not directly referring to me but Im guilty. The sunday christian... live like a saint on sunday, act like the devil the rest of the week, those who treat sunday as a ritual... just somewhere to go to and spend some time each week. (Break again)
If you are reading this Paula... don't go all bezerk on me next time we meet k? I don'tt want Rachel and all pouring over my spiritual life... I really need that but Im ick of trying. Ive been trying to get baptised but I juct can't do it... the amount of times Ive gone during Ranger's camps and stuff and asked to recieve the gift of tounges and failed standing there surrounded by all my commanders, mouth open. hands up, mouth open without a single word coming out... This facade falls now... I may do stuff to please you ppl but I know there is nothing inside so it dosen't really count k?
If you read it up till here (Man, you've got real good endurance!) That covers almost all my feelings... going off now, rememebr to tag or comment k? Thanks.
Quote of the post:
I deserve nothing more than I have
Cos, nothing I have is really mine...
Like my title, I don't know if I have done the right thing... And if you are reading this it should clear things up a bit. I was not trying to make you guess... I was just .. not trying to be too obvious.... Yeah. After plucking up that courage the second attempt to reach out for my goal, heaven has made a fool of me again. You never got the underlying message... ahh my fair lady, not MY fair lady, but let me ask you, do you allow yourself to be MY fair lady? (This is as direct as it gets... my ears are burning already.. so embarassing)
Heaven does make great sport of me, taunting, twisting... teasing. Is it a good thing you never understood? Or was it just fate that was not meant to be... Like I said, I DONT believe in fate, what you want must be achieved with your own hands and thus I tried. Weather I succeed or fail, I will end up confused and dis-orienteated. As I wait for the final result of this... my mind is numb. The time is far from perfect, there are millions of things more important to focus on at the moment, the Os and Prelims are creeping nearer and nearer, the year ends are catching up... But this last few months are like they are, the LAST FEW months. If I don't act now, I will lose the chance forever...
I know that after this, or even now. People change... Im being very selfish. I like you as you are now, please don't change, so I put it to you before it is too late... before you change... The signs of change are already very evident in you... I really am hanging on to this last chance...
Getting back CA2 results tommrrow... after all I did today, results, studies all seem so insignificant. Two posts ago, I shot a flaming arrow out onto the unexpecting public but now... I've been shot by my very OWN arrow. I have decided to edit or delete that post, Feeling so damn stupid now. Funny how life decides to throw you things when you really don't expect it?
Things in the past, things yet unseen, wishes and dreams that are yet to come true, all those regrets... no where to go but up. Yeah, up. Stupid right? Yup sounds real stupid but Up is the way to go. Once again I stare at the sky and ask myself, "Is there a God up there?" Im SUPPOSED to be a christian. The keyword? SUPPOSED. If I call myself a christian, I am a very bad christian. We are supposed to believe, unwavering faith in our God. Silent, always watching over his children, welcoming all who come to him with a willing heart, wholeheartedly. (Im breaking this up or it will be too big a chunk)
Well, I dont know, maybe I think too much... but I seriously doubt whenever I pray or whatever. I never hear God's voice, ever. I can't recieve the gift of tounges... all I have to do is believe and seek ernestly it seems but there is always half of my mind... asking, questioning... What is it going to be like? How will it feel? How will it sound? And then the nothingness... Im sick of trying... Sick of keeping up this act. Yes, many have preached about the kind of person I am... not directly referring to me but Im guilty. The sunday christian... live like a saint on sunday, act like the devil the rest of the week, those who treat sunday as a ritual... just somewhere to go to and spend some time each week. (Break again)
If you are reading this Paula... don't go all bezerk on me next time we meet k? I don'tt want Rachel and all pouring over my spiritual life... I really need that but Im ick of trying. Ive been trying to get baptised but I juct can't do it... the amount of times Ive gone during Ranger's camps and stuff and asked to recieve the gift of tounges and failed standing there surrounded by all my commanders, mouth open. hands up, mouth open without a single word coming out... This facade falls now... I may do stuff to please you ppl but I know there is nothing inside so it dosen't really count k?
If you read it up till here (Man, you've got real good endurance!) That covers almost all my feelings... going off now, rememebr to tag or comment k? Thanks.
Quote of the post:
I deserve nothing more than I have
Cos, nothing I have is really mine...
Newest updates! ^^
Lets see, I added the Haloscan comments and trackback thingy (wounds is comments, and casualties is trackbacks.. yea) Changed the display pic at the top cos the old one vanished (curse me for direct linking...) and I added in a small gallery of quiz results I got... They are pretty accurate too! ^_^ Scroll down, it is below the main menu. Thats for updates! Cya!
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