Congrats to Rong Sheng for becoming the newly appointed Outpost Commander of Singapore Royal Rangers Outpost #1! Wheeee- it is a great honor to know you as a friend and as a fellow Ranger. I believe God's call on your life will send echoes and ripples impacting the lives of many others in this new role.
I just taught my FIRST lesson to my ARs ^_^ They sure are capable and decisive once they get down to it. I can vaguely begin to see how this can turn out to be a rewarding enterprise. CRR was fun :) Sadly I didn't have the presence of mind to be snapping pictures and Dilys had to leave early so the only imprint we have left of the event would be those caught through our eyes and seared to our brains - muddled by our own individual discrepancies and bias.
Last night I went for a total of two BBQ parties. They were so starkly different and painfully contrasting that I couldn't help but stop and think about how my life would have turned out- on two different ends of the spectrum.
One was RR thanksgiving for Round Up, all the ERs naturally were invited as well :) It was wholesome (somewhat) and incredibly fun. We ate, fellowshipped, worked and played together as a singular unit. The outpost. We cooked for one another and we ate together. We cleared up as a collective and we got a ride home even from people who lived out of the way- by then it was already 10.45pm. After a quick change I left and set out for SA's birthday party at his house- never for once thinking about the consequences and situations I would be faced with.
The first thing I was struck by from arrival to departure was the heavy stench of cigarette smoke in the air. I think within that 3 hours or so there I have inhaled more then my week's or even two week's worth of second hand smoke. Only going through those open gates and passing a few half-hearted greetings to old acquaintances did the severity of my displacement begin to emerge. Save for the host who, I have somehow managed to stay in contact with I have had precious little to say and share with the rest. I neither smoke, nor drank and the pounding noise that passed for music was pleasantly out of discernible range inside the house. I happily settled outside on the porch with the BBQ pit- resisting offers of food with a vengeance.
As more and more unfamiliar faces left and more familiar but relatively unknown faces popped up I felt drawn into a circle of conversation. Revolving conveniently around army, clubbing (which I have no experience of), girls and flings (of whom the names and descriptions are beyond me), drinks (which I have no interest in) and the old times. Needless to say I was a quiet observer much of the time there_ joining in only on topics where I would have any say at all.
Nearing 2 I was settled and reluctant to move. Inertia had taken its toll and me and I was comfortable sitting in that circle watching events go by until someone started rounds of drinks. The colorful bottles and intoxicating smells evaded me was I watched them mix, pour and gulp down shot glass after glass. Initially they somewhat respected my choice (It is with some small pride that they did say: what do you expect? He is Chang Xiang_ he does not drink) but as the night dragged on and inhibitions fell clouded by the smoke I did not realize that all our inhibitions had begun to slip. I was this close to a shot glass full of some transparent fluid (which by mere virtue of smell made me nauseous- it was that close to my face) when I decided it was time to take a stand and leave. No one, nobody in the world could challenge me to do something I had resolved not to. Not even old friends, for their face- not even on their 21st birthday. I had to leave.
Walking home (it was well past 2, no more public transport) I felt humbled by the experience. It must have been the prompting and courage of the Holy Spirit that I took the step of Faith. I may have spoilt some people's fun and I may have seemed unsporting. And I do sincerely apologize but there are lines in life we must not cross. I took a stand and I am proud of it.
One party, full of life and laughter, with people around who care and love one another. The other also full of laughter, but hollow, fueled by drunkenness and debauchery (out of sight at least) and of unsatisfied lives chasing the next mambo, the next shot glass, that next number, that next fling, full of people but devoid of humanity, one can easily feel very alone in a flood of familiar but equally lost faces. I felt like I have been put through a lot within a span of a day. I've seen what a life could become without Godly guidance and the simple pull of social norms. And I now pray that the righteous stand firm and maintain the standards of God who is the same yesterday, today and forever. As the old conservative generation passes for the new younger generation- I pray that the status quo is maintained, that the values which many have fought hard and long to protect will not fall to the docile, scheming enemy under the misused flag of freedom.
I know it is a ridiculous time but I can't get to sleep without getting this off my chest and my head. Blessed be the Lord our shield and strong tower.
Quote of e Post:
Heaven and earth will fade
But His word will still remain
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