Tuesday, February 09, 2010

Empty Apartment

Call me out
You stayed inside
One you love
Is where you hide
Shot me down
As I flew by
Crash and burn
I think sometimes
You forget where the heart is

Answer no to these questions
Let her go, learn a lesson
It's not me, you're not listening
Now, can't you see something's missing
You forget where the heart is


Take you away from that empty apartment
You stay, and forget where the heart is
Someday if ever you loved me you'd say, it's okay

Waking up from this nightmare
How's your life?
What's it like there?
Is it all what you want it to be?
Does it hurt when you think about me?
And how broken my heart is

Take you away from that empty apartment
You stay, and forget where the heart is
Someday if ever you loved me you'd say, it's okay

It's okay to be angry and never let go
It only gets harder the more that you know
When you get lonely if no one's around
You know that I'll catch you when you're falling down
We came together but you left alone
And I know how it feels to walk out on your own
Maybe someday I will see you again
And you'll look me in my eyes and call me your friend

Take you away from that empty apartment
You stay, and forget where the heart is
Someday if ever you loved me you'd say, it's okay

It's okay
It's okay
______________________________________________________-

My song of the week.

Monday, February 01, 2010

Hope vs Wish

Just remembered something from watchnight methinks.

To wish is merely to imagine something inconcieveable happening, but to HOPE is a state loaded with an expectation of a future development.

Truly, no more wishing.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iTouch

Simply unclear

I suppose everyone has thought themselves uniquely brilliant at one point or other in their youth. Yet daily now I see those illusions debunked and refuted. In each cryptic line and dispairing tone. Maybe I'm seeing the ghost of me that isn't present in these lives yet it is unsettling. We are aren't that different, yet unique enough to draw blanks upon scrutiny.

These lives, these people. Do I really know who, or what I'm talking to? What manner of humanity, with all it's liabilities, quirks and nuances are they which have eluded my notice?

Just when I was beginning to feel like I've settled my debts and left the past behind me. Just what are you?

Quote of e post:
Why do you do this to me
Why do you do this so easily

- Posted using BlogPress from my iTouch

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Be objective minded

How do people stay fast and tough it out when everything goes to hell? What can give a person strength to go on when they are exhausted on all fronts? A belief, a goal- any goal: short term ones are best in the midst of the worst case scenarios. Keep a clear mind and grit your teeth while staying single minded and focused on grinding through one week, two hours, heck even one more step, one foot before the other will suffice as a short term goal when you feel like you are going to collapse in a heap and lose consciousness. When there is nothing which resembles any shred of normalcy you once knew and you need to continue forging ahead some people rely on God. I do too, but probably not in the same way. God gives me strength, mental strength- knowing that I am not alone, knowing that things could be a whole lot worse, knowing that in the event that everything really goes topside my future is secure.

How is God real to you? Not physically, but I sense Him, I feel His prompting and I hear His word. I see His hand at work in the mundane things in life. I recognize His sovereignty in the big events in life. More evidently, I witness the change He has wrought in the lives of those around me.

Pain is a sign that weakness is leaving your body. An unbreakable mind leads to an unyielding body. Pain can be ignored, pain can be swallowed, pain is bearable. One objective at a time, everything else in the world is secondary- this time, this place.

I don't think that you even know what you're looking for.

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Goodbye again

Had the most wonderful weekend. A huge snowball of Seoul garden, cell, the wedding, catching up with Edina, lack of sleep and the most ice cream I've eaten in months over a single weekend. Haha, catching the last bus and getting "stranded" with Joshua on the way to send Edina off was a walk of faith. I don't think I'd have ever done anything as risky as that for almost anyone else.

Here I am waiting
Abide in me I pray
Here I am longing
For You
Hide me in Your love
Bring me to my knees
May I know Jesus
More and more

Come live in me
All my life
Take over
Come breathe in me
I will rise
On eagle's wings

Never forget.

ORD this weekend. Like all things in life, once you're there the hype just starts to die off.

Quote of the Post:
Psalm 23:4 (New International Version)

4 Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death, [a]
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.